


The Worst Pain

by Saikarp



Series: True love is a pain [2]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2016-02-23
Packaged: 2018-04-08 06:06:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 47,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4293609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saikarp/pseuds/Saikarp
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You don't put two monsters in a relationship commie we'll only wind up killing each other." "Nyet comrade we'll destroy the world!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prussia origins

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back with a darker story this time enjoy the madness!

The Worst Pain

 

How the hell did I wind up in Russia's bed with my arms and legs. Bound around my captor's neck and waist?  
Gilbert Belshmit formally known as Prussia. Had been in plenty of difficult situations before.  
But being with Russia in his bed. Had awoken something that he'd thought that only, West could use.  
Something that was struggling to devour him and, Russia both. The monster inside of him had found a, companion at last.  
But why had it taken so long. For him to see himself in Russia? They hadn't always been like this when they'd, first met.   
Russia had been a crybaby. Who would run away every chance he got. But now I'm getting ahead of myself.  
This story doesn't start here. It starts on the day I was born. Back to the brief time when I could've been, called innocent.  
My first name was The Order of Saint Maria. That's right the awesome me started out as a doctor.  
Granted I didn't do much healing. But I tended my people as best I could. When I opened my eyes for the first time.  
All I could see was the blue of my Vauti's eyes. As he held me gently to his chest. "Hello little one can you, speak yet?"  
I could only stare at first but when his expression changed. I opened my mouth and said.  
"Ja Vauti where are we?" Immediately Vauti smiled and said. "Home child this is Nordmark the place you will, help me. To protect and expand."  
At the time I didn't understand everything that he said. I was convinced that I was meant to heal.  
Everyone who came to me not just mine or those who could pay. On the third day of my life I saw my first battle.  
Vauti had left to fight a man named Mongolia. A nation that was spreading his territory.  
Almost as fast as Vauti. I was still to young to fight, or help with the serious injuries.  
But everyone always seemed to smile. Whenever I came near them. So I stayed in the tent with the other doctors and, watched my doctors.  
As they went about their work and learned a very, important thing. Being willing to heal anyone that is sent, to you is a noble thing.  
But once you've healed them don't expect a thank you. Especially if it's an enemy nation hell-bent on beating his opponents.  
Anyway he can and add them to his collection. This is how I met Mongolia and nearly, lost my mind the first time.  
The battle had been long but it had ended at the sun, went down. Vauti had come in looking thoughtful and, exhausted but still smiled for me.  
As I clumsily wiped the dirt and blood off him. Checking him for any injuries that I could help treat.  
"I'm all right Nordmark they're only flesh wounds. The enemy didn't seem very eager today."  
"Why do you say that Vauti?" I was on his sword arm with some bandages. When he replied.  
"Mongolia went after our people but fled from me." "Is that normal I'd run from you, if you were trying to hurt me Vauti."  
This amused Vauti and he hugged me with his other arm. So that I could keep working as he continued to speak.  
"Nein kleiner it's not normal. In war when nations face each other they battle, to spare the people."  
"But if that's how it's supposed to be then why do, our people have to fight?" "Because a strong army, healthy economy, and a wise leader. Are needed for a nation to be strong. War is necessary to prove this."  
He meant well I knew that but sometimes Vauti confused me. With his combat experience and years of peace.  
I would've thought that Vauti knew everything. When it came to fighting but I was wrong.  
As soon as I finished treating his wounds. Vauti sent me to bed so he could, speak with his generals.  
To plan for the next battle. I remember feeling anxious and alert. Something was wrong and I knew that, sleep would be impossible.  
Until I knew what it was and helped fix it. Vauti said I needed my people to be, strong so they can fight our enemies.  
But they can't be strong if they're not healthy. Since I can't fight like Vauti I must, do my best to heal the people.  
One last round of checking on paionets before bed. Wouldn't effect me too much and it would bolster the doctors.  
Who would continue to work all night. So I went to every tent. Helping out a little bit at some but usually being sent away.  
Almost as soon as I entered. It's a good thing I mastered walking. During my second day otherwise I, would've been carried to my tent.  
Without having helped anyone or discovered what was wrong. But then again if I had just gone to bed.  
Maybe I wouldn't have turned out like this? I was near the end of my rounds. When I saw Mongolia for the first time.  
Standing up he was as tall as Vauti. With short curly hair that matched his dark eyes.  
It was his eyes that confirmed the wrongness in the air. His eyes were like bits of black ice.  
That only reflected what he chose. I might've run away just then but I could see him, cradling his side.  
No one else was nearby and the man wasn't moving. "Hello how long have you been there?" I was walking foreword slowly to show I didn't mean any harm.  
Despite my small size. People have coward away from me due to my red eyes and, silver hair.  
They said I looked like a demon but Vauti didn't mind. He said I was beautiful and this man didn't fear me.  
If anything he seemed amused that such a tiny being. Was offering to help him. Without even asking his name.  
"Show me your wounds please and I'll tend them for you." I showed him the pack I carried. Was filled with bandages and herbs.  
At this the man laughed and said. "Your a little young to be on the battlefield boy. Have you been a doctor long?"  
"My whole life now where does it hurt?" He shifted his arm and I saw a gash along his side.  
It didn't look deep and the blood. Had already dried and adhered his clothes to his skin.  
I went closer to begin cleaning it. When the man's arm was wrapped around me. The sudden movement had me, pressed to his chest and before I knew it.  
My feet were off the ground and I was being carried away! "I'm sure it's not your fault little one. You're still a child and from what I've learned. Germania isn't the best parent."  
I couldn't see where we were going. But I knew he wasn't taking me back to camp.  
So I tried to scream for help. But once again the man surprised me by covering my, mouth with his hand.  
"Bite me and you'll need a doctor little one." I believed him but I still tried to get away.  
He let me squirm for a moment. Then slammed my head against a tree. I didn't pass out right away so he did it again.  
All the while he continued to move away from camp. The second strike made me sleep. When I woke up I was bound with rope on my wrists, legs, and onto a tree.  
The man was across from me lighting a fire. He looked at me when it was lit and smiled. "Now that you're awake let's have a proper introduction."  
"I know who you are." This seemed to amuse him and I, whished my voice hadn't been so quiet.  
"Is that so well then who am I young doctor?" "Mongolia you ran from Vauti instead of, facing him in battle."  
"That's right and I suppose you want to know why?" "Ja." I wouldn't address him as sir, anymore if I could help it.  
Being on the battlefield had shown me. Some of the things that he could do. "I'll explain everything to you if, you tell me your name."  
"My people call me Saint Maria but Vauti calls me Nordmark." I watched him move closer to me.  
He sat down and stared at me before asking. "How much has Germania told you about, me and this fight?"  
I told him what I knew which wasn't much. When I finished speaking Mongolia, was disgusted.  
"I hope you realize that my point about his parenting skills. Now to reward your honesty I'll tell you why, you're here..."  
His words would be repeated by every nation at one time or another. Myself included once I grew up a bit more.  
To put it another way war is a kind of manifest destiny. Mongolia can't take Germania down directly.  
So he came for me. A new nation without any true land, to hold me down and training. In war to make anyone hesitate in taking me on.  
The only advantage I had was that I was still a newborn. Very few nations knew I existed.  
"It was just dumb luck that I sensed you." "You won't be able to keep me Vauti is, going to stop you."  
Mongolia stroked my cheek and smiled before saying. "Will he be in time?" Vauti did rescue me and I never saw, Mongolia again.  
But that night proved my Vauti had been right. A nation shouldn't be unbloodied. Mongolia untied me from the tree but left my arms and legs tied.  
He then pulled out a knife and cut off my clothes. "Now don't you worry I'm sure, Germania will be coming for you. But since we're not in my country yet I thought I'd, help you grow."  
He slid the blade over my chest and started to cut, above my heart. I couldn't help but scream and Mongolia, kept talking.  
"Yes that's right Maria scream and let your blood, paint your lovely skin. I have another territory waiting, to meet you."  
Once he finished cutting over my heart the blade moved lower. Past my navel and my inner thighs.  
"He'll be so happy to have a friend Maria." This last part was said in such a sick, crooning whisper.   
That I knew that I was doomed for something far worse. Then being killed with a knife.  
Whoever Mongolia was talking about must be, suffering unimaginably. The knife left my thighs and I, was rolled onto my stomach.  
Once again the knife explored my body leaving cuts, all over my body. Mongolia started making shallow cuts, on my legs and licked some blood.  
From my neck and said. "I can't wait to take you home." I could barely breathe as the knife made a final visit to my arms.  
Then Mongolia stood up and walked around the camp. When he returned the knife didn't reappear but he wasn't safe.  
Mongolia had one final thing to say. "Poor Maria it seems that Germania won't be, coming soon. So how about I make you mine now and tomorrow-"  
"You'll be dead." I had never heard my Vauti's voice, sound so cold. But I was glad to hear it and the sounds of a scuffle.  
Mongolia hadn't planned on Germania checking his son's, tent to ensure. His safety and welfare every night before, falling asleep beside him.  
What Germania lacked in parental knowledge he made up, for with rage. At finding his bleeding and naked son at his, enemies feet.  
Germania saved me and tended to me while Mongolia's, body disappeared. His bloody head seemed to stare at me, with satisfied expectation.


	2. A peek inside Russia's head

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set a few years later and a flashback provided by a mysterious voice called Viktor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief mentions of underage sex but nothing graphic.

Chapter 2 Russia didn't like it when Mongolia was around. No matter what mood he was in. Their interactions were scary and painful. The times when Mongolia were gone brought little relief to, the boy. Since his land was so large he had a hard time finding, his sisters. Even with General Winter for company Russia felt alone. (At least I got to meet someone today. Lithuania seems like he'll make a good friend.) Even if he didn't break free soon he knew that he would be, free someday. A voice told and promised him this just as, General Winter promised. To always protect him and destroy his enemies. Russia didn't like living with Mongolia. But the voice said he had to wait for now. /Soon you'll have everything you want Ivan just be a good boy, and smile./ "How soon is soon Viktor I'm so tired of living, like this!" (Why is my only friend a voice in my head who makes me feel cold?) Russia shivered as he felt the air caress him despite being, in his room. "Did General Winter decide to visit or is that you Viktor?" /Afraid it's just me Ivan. But don't worry things will get better./ Ivan just nodded and tried to build up his fire. Since he didn't know when Mongolia would, summon him next. Ivan liked to be warm and comfterable. As much as possible in his free time. "I wonder if he really wanted me to have a friend? Viktor do you know who Mongolia. Was talking about that day?" /I only know what you know but I can show you that memory. If you want or do you have, something else to do?/ "Nyet the more tricks you show me. The closer I get to mastering them myself!" /Very true all right here it is./ Ivan blinked his eyes and he found himself still in his room. Except it looked grayish and there was another him in it! The grayish Ivan was trying to learn Mongolian from a book. But a loud noise from his master's, room distracted him. Mongolia hadn't been back in a long time. What really worried Russia was that Mongolia. Always visited him when he was home. (But how did he get home I didn't hear him in the hallway, and that sound.) Even back then Russia knew how to define a scream. Mongolia was angry and in pain which didn't bode well for, grayish Ivan. Regular Ivan looked between his past self and the door. He knew that Viktor controlled the spell and could speed things up. To the part that Ivan was interested in but Viktor rarely did. /It's important that you learn your lessons Ivan. You can't take shortcuts after all. Unless you wish to stay weak?/ "Nyet I'll see this through to the end Viktor." /Good boy./ He didn't shiver this time. When the air wrapped around him. Viktor's hugs always had a cold feeling but he meant well. Ivan preferred Viktor over Mongolia, every day. Suddenly the door opened. Both Ivan's stared as Mongolia came in, with tears running down his face. "Welcome back Master why are you crying sir?" Mongolia said nothing as he walked over to Ivan then lifted, the boy. Into his arms and mumbled something. "I'm sorry sir I didn't hear you." Mongolia sighed and said. "I'm sorry Russia I found someone to be your friend but..." (He wants me to have friends but what about China?) "I almost made him mine. If Germania hadn't interfered." Neither Ivan could repress a shudder at Mongolia's words. Both still and would always bear the mark. From that first night with Mongolia. Mongolia sighed and looked at the boy in his lap. "It's a real shame you know. He's still just a baby and yet..." Gray Ivan looked up into Mongolia's eyes and asked. "What?" "The boy is beautiful he has the face of a demon. Yet he has the temperament of an angel, of death." Mongolia then whispered. "But he won't stay that way. Prizes like yourself always wake up eventually." While gray Ivan was listening to him. Russia and Viktor watched as Mongolia took out a bloody knife. Then placed the dull side of the blade against gray Ivan's lips. "If you truly wish to understand why he'll be perfect, for you. Clean this blade with your tounge then we'll have dinner." Gray Ivan reluctantly did as he was told and Mongolia left him alone. To go see about dinner and the vision faded. Ivan looked out his window and saw it was time to make Mongolia. His tea and he left the room quickly and said. "Thank you Viktor." /Your welcome Ivan. Did you learn your lesson?/ Ivan rolled his tounge as he thought about the blood. It hadn't tasted any differently than his own and Viktor. Hadn't remarked on it except to say. That he would know it's owner. /You'll have to taste it again but don't worry. If this Maria lives up to Mongolia's expectations. Then the future will be more interesting./ "But when will I meet him I don't want anyone else to suffer. Under Mongolia's care and become like me." /There is nothing wrong with you and Mongolia. Isn't the only one who enjoys suffering./ Ivan didn't argue with him. He knew that Viktor would keep him up all night if he did. "I have to make Master's tea." Viktor said nothing else. As Ivan went about his final duty of the evening. Once everything was ready. Ivan made a tea tray and went to Mongolia's room. He knocked on the door and Mongolia told him to enter. "Your tea is ready master." "Just place it on the desk Russia." "Yes sir." It never ceased to amaze Ivan that Mongolia could, be calm. Without hurting someone or planning something awful. Ever since he made him drink Maria's blood. Mongolia had pushed Russia. Even harder with his training and education. Sometimes going so far as to leave him outside. All night to make him stronger. Of course Ivan wanted to get stronger but, Mongolia still scared him. Once the tea was set down Ivan completed the ritual by asking. "Is there anything else I can do for you Master?" "Yes you can take off your coat and scarf. I want to test you again." "Da Master." The last time Ivan had tried to avoid a test. Mongolia broke his hips and legs then used him in bed. (At least he didn't tell me to, completely strip. I might be able to make it back to my room tonight.) Viktor said nothing. But Ivan could feel his presence and, took comfort in it. Even though Viktor couldn't fight Mongolia. At least he wouldn't be alone either. Anything is better than being with Mongolia when he's in, a mood. Ivan removed his upper layers and folded them neatly into a corner. "Now face the wall with hands against it while I finish work." "Da Master." (Good delay always means I don't have to share his bed.) Mongolia watched Russia from the corner of his eye. As he pretended to do paperwork. Little Russia didn't know it yet. But his master had planned something special for him. Something even worse than one night with him. Something that would stay with Russia. For the rest of his life and help him be, the nation he is today. Mongolia picked up a box from under his desk. Then walked over to the boy with an evil grin. "I have something for you Russia. A reward for your hard work and loyalty." Ivan tensed at the last word he wasn't loyal to Mongolia. He was just to weak to break free from him. "Thank you Master." "Your welcome Russia now close your eyes." Ivan did so reluctantly and strained his senses for any, kind of threat. Mongolia grabbed Russia's scarf. Then opened the box to reveal a wire collar. The wire was gold and silver and had, several faceted gems. That with enough pressure it would cut into the skin. But even that wasn't the worst part of it. Mongolia had designed the lock to be similar to a chiness finger trap. Unless you knew how to work it. The collar would tighten until Mongolia loosened it or Russia, passed out. Soundlessly Mongolia took out the collar and wrapped it around, Ivan's neck. He gasped as he felt the wire touch his neck but Ivan, didn't move. Once Mongolia made sure the collar wasn't to loose. He put the scarf into the box and smiled. "All right go look in the mirror. I want to know what you think of it." Ivan was afraid to speak at first. The collar was beautiful in a simplistic way. (But once I put my scarf on...) He quickly looked around for his scarf but, couldn't see it on his coat. "Is something wrong Russia you don't look happy." "I'm happy Master I was just looking for my scarf." "I have it here why do you want it?" Ivan tried not to look relived. As he tentavely held out his hands for the box. "My big sister Ukraine gave it to me. I don't want to lose my presents Master." Mongolia let him have his scarf back but kept, it in the box. "I want you to keep the collar visible when you're inside the house." "Da Master." "Speaking of your sister I hear you tried to escape-" "Nyet I-" Ivan didn't see the blow coming and his head crashed, into the mirror. Ivan felt blood running down his face and tried, to cover his head. "I'm sorry-" A kick to his stomach sent him to the floor. "What are you apologizing for Russia. Lying to me, interrupting me, or trying to escape again. Which of these things am I to forgive?" "All of them please Master Mongolia." (Why do these things always happen to me? All I wanted was some time for myself.) Mongolia said nothing as he pulled out a bamboo cane. How ironic that something of China. Would help him test Russia's new collar. Since China has done his best to keep Mongolia's anger off of, the boy. He'd have to make sure to bring China the cane. Once he finished coating it in the boy's blood. "Do you truly wish for me to forgive you Russia?" "Da Master I won't-" The cane came down with a sickening smack. Making the boy scream and try to roll away. Which only made Mongolia continue to hit him. As he said in a calm voice. "See Russia this is proof that your lying. If you really meant what you said. You wouldn't be trying to escape, this punishment." Ivan could only scream as the cane tore into his body. Every inch of bare skin. On his back and chest from the neck down. Became a bloody ruin. Mongolia brought the cane down a final, time and broke it. Across his butt and thighs. The boy barely let out a whimper at this last act and, Mongolia smiled. He picked up the pieces of the cane and kissed, Russia's cheek. "Remember the rules and do as I say Russia. Or else you'll be alone with me. For the rest of your life." Ivan could barely speak but he managed the correct response. "Da Master Mongolia. Thank you for the gift and test."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will have the birth of the Teutonic Knights and Germania's disappearance.


	3. Teutonic Knight's early days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title says it all and I own nothing but the plot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok we have some very special characters introduced here and does anyone one know. How Prussia met Lithuania and his animals in fanfic form? If so please send a link and enjoy the chapter!

Chapter 3

 

Germania loved him. That's what kept running through Gilbert's mind. As his Vauti watched him become the Teutonic Knights.  
He didn't grow very much but the sword his leader gave him. Now felt like it had been forged for his hand.  
He still didn't know how to use it very well. But Vauti was going to give him his first lesson.  
As soon as the pain faded. "Does it always hurt this much?" "Ja and sometimes more so we need to work on that as well. Pain is a way to gain strength."  
"Does that mean I'll be as strong as you someday?" "Nein you're going to be even, stronger than me."  
I was thrilled to hear him say that. Ever since my people were absorbed with the Teutonic Knights.  
Vauti's eyes became slightly cold. Even when he held me in his arms. The gentleness and love was still there but now...  
With the change in my religion. I've finally become a warrior. I'll be able to protect my people and maybe have land, of my own.  
But Vauti is my enemy now and once my lesson is over... "Vauti I'm sorry please don't hate me, I love you!"  
Vauti just held me closer and rubbed my back as a final spasm, of pain. Shook my now five year old looking body.  
"I don't hate you Gilshbet we have no choice but to obey. The will of our people but you will, always be my son."  
"Will we have to fight each other now?" "Nein I have a plan to ensure that never happens. But right now we need to train you."  
"Ja Vauti I promise I'll work hard." "Good boy now let's get you into your new uniform." I was sad to leave his lap.  
But I had to admit putting on the chain mail and tunic. As well as the rest of it. Made me feel awesome.  
Like I could do anything and face anyone. As long as I had my sword. Then not even Mongolia could touch me.  
That's what I believed until Vauti kept disarming me. By the end of the day. My body was one giant bruise.  
"Not bad for one who used to tend injuries. You show a natural talent for making them." "Thank you Vauti."  
(Was that really praise it didn't sound like the usual compliments.) Still if Vauti's happy than everything is fine.  
"Time for a bath then we'll have dinner." "Ja Vauti just give me a minute." The ground felt nice and soft to me.  
I could've lain there all night but Vauti held out his hand. So I took it and he pulled me to my feet.  
"Remember what I told you?" "Ja I'll use this pain to get stronger. But it's ok to rest every once in a while right?"  
"Of course now let's get cleaned up." Bathing in the river was so much fun! Once I got over the cold I started practicing.  
Holding my breath underwater. While Vauti cleaned up our clothes and then cleaned himself up.  
Swimming with him and splashing around. Made us both laugh so much. That when we had dinner everyone was happy and for the, first time.  
I thought that this peace. Was truly a perfect heaven. Everyone being happy together is something that I always wanted.  
Both to be a part of and the cause of it. I wanted Vauti to smile forever. Sadly this night was the last time I saw him.  
By the time I woke up the next morning he was gone. He didn't say goodbye. Or leave any messages for me.  
Everything that could remind me of him was gone. As if the time we spent together. Was nothing more than a dream.  
I couldn't let it get to me I knew that Vauti never lied to me. No matter what happens I carry German blood.  
So I will always be proud of this and show the world my awesomeness. That way when I meet up with Vauti again.  
Even if we have to fight each other. At least he'll be able to smile with me again. My leader had me ride with him that day.  
"It's time we started our mission Teutonic Knight." "Yes sir where are we going first?" "North for now there are many heretics' up there."  
Time is a funny thing for a nation I knew that a few years, had gone by. Yet my body barely grew and lately I've been, feeling strange.  
Lately some of my people have been getting restless with wandering. They wanted to settle down and leave the order.  
I don't like it when my people fight each other. That's not how it's supposed to be. But I don't know what to do.  
No one ever says it's my fault but whenever I talk to the deserters. My leader get's angry and gives me extra training.  
My people are starting to feel strange to me. As though some of them are no longer mine. Despite the uniforms they wear.  
(I wish I could ask someone for advice maybe if I find this, nation by myself. Then we could just talk like me and Vauti, used to do!)  
It's a perfect plan and if I get attacked I'll just beat them up. Straight forward and simple is a great way to go.  
So I went off alone. The land I was in looked very pretty and, good for crops. I understood why some of my people wanted to stay.  
But if we stay in one place. Can we still fulfill our mission or will I become someone else? (It's not like I'm attached to this name. I'm still getting used to being a knight.)  
I hadn't been paying that much attention to my surroundings. So when something fell on my head. I admit to panicking a little bit.  
"Convert you nonbeliever or prepare to taste my awesome steel!" A little yellow bird just stared up at me from his new, seat on the ground.  
(He must've fell off my head when I drew my sword.) Yes I felt stupid but I was still learning, how to fight so fuck off.  
Not seeing anyone else around I put my sword away. "Um sorry about that bird I was looking, for someone to talk to. I don't know why you fell on me but you, should get off the ground."  
The bird just sat there and I could feel the nation moving away. So I took out some bread and broke off a piece.  
"Here this makes us even ok you can eat this and become even cuter. I have to go find that other nation goodbye now."  
A soft "piyo piyo" answered me as I walked away. But I didn't turn around. I had to find that nation.  
Finally I did in a small meadow he had brown hair down to his shoulders. With tannish skin and green eyes but what really drew me.  
Was a torn Teutonic Knight uniform lying beside him. While he was wearing a deep green tunic.  
(How did that uniform get here?) I walked a little closer and saw that the boy looked, about my age.  
(I can do this and if he attacks I can take him.) "Hi my name's Lithuania what's yours?" That was surprising I didn't expect him to be friendly.  
Maybe this will be easy. "I'm the Teutonic Knight it's nice to, meet you heathen." Lithuania looked at my uniform.  
Then at the one beside him and asked. "Does this belong to you?" "I was about to ask you that." "It's not mine someone put it on me. When I first woke up."  
(Now that he mentions it the uniform is to small for either, of us. Let alone a full grown man but why was it left here?)  
"Was it torn when you woke up?" "Yes and I've been coming back here every day. To see if the owner would return."  
While Lithuania was talking I walked over to him and sat down. Something told me that it was the right thing to do.  
Besides except for a bow and arrows he was unarmed. It wouldn't be right to take, advantage of that.  
(Maybe he doesn't realize the danger.) "Say do you normally travel so lightly armed?" "No I usually carry a sword and shield, but I feel safe here."  
"I know what you mean. This place shouldn't get blood on it." "Glad to hear it say if your not busy do you want to play a game?"  
"I don't know my leader says I have to focus on my training." "Oh come on I know we're nations but we're kids to. Shouldn't we at least try to have some fun. There's no one here but us."  
The time I spent swimming with Vauti flashed through my mind. I wanted to have more memories. Like that and I wanted one with Lithuania.  
"All right what do you want to play?" I felt no regrets as we played together. The meadow was soon filled with laughter.  
As the sun was setting I finally got around to my question. "I don't know what to do. How do I make everyone happy?"  
"I don't know I haven't met that many people yet and your, the first. That I've met and played with but it's not like, your losing everyone right?"  
"Ja but why do I need to lose anyone. It's bad enough when they die. But why do they have to leave. What did I do wrong?"  
Lithuania just took my hands and did his best to console me. But nothing he said made any difference.  
I had no way of reuniting my people. This rebellion was already tearing me apart and as I looked, at Lithuania.  
I felt that this would be the last time I would be happy to, see him. For a very long time after I rejoined my people and, became halved.  
By the deserters making a nation for themselves. I don't know how long the infighting, lasted but when I saw Lithuania.  
Fighting with the deserters and against me I felt pain in a, different way. My friend was trying to kill me and Vauti, abandoned me after failing.   
To protect me from becoming a knight. Perhaps Mongolia had the right of it. If I want to survive I have to change but what should, I become?  
At the end of the battle I had no answers. Lithuania tried to talk to me but I stayed by my leader's side.   
As we were driven farther north. "I thought he was my friend." "You can't be friends with traitors and heretics, Teutonic Knight. Our people are the only ones worthy of your trust."  
I didn't argue with him. As a rule I try not to argue with my, leaders to much. It's not good for the people or me.  
But one good thing came of going to the meadow that day. As I fell asleep that night. Two newcomers slipped into my tent, that night.  
I don't know how they found me. But I recognized the bird right away. "How'd you get in here who's this?"  
(Don't birds fly away from cats. Why is he siting on the cat's head?) The only response I got was a piyo then the white, kitten walked closer.  
I picked up the cat and the bird flew up and landed on my head. "Hey I'm not a tree!" I shook my head but every time I, stopped moving.  
The bird just landed on me again while the cat just stared, at us and purred. "Fine I'll be an awesome tree but no pooping on, me and as for you. Mister cat what am I supposed to do with you?"  
The cat made himself at home on my bedding and the bird followed suit. "If your going to stay with me then you need names."  
I layed down beside them and my new friends moved closer to me. "From now on your names are Gilbird and Gilcat. You can call me Gilbert ok?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will have Russia fluff and maybe the first encounter between my favorite characters!


	4. First meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Battle of the Ice and a friend for Russia!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What happens when a quiet boy snaps? Just to warn everyone some of the dialogue is from the anime. So no one sue me the rest is mine.

Chapter 4

 

In all of the things that I owned I placed a piece of myself. So that I would be able to hide my true strength.   
Until I kill Mongolia. /Ivan where are you trying to go?/ "No where Viktor I'm just walking."  
Lately that's all I ever seem to do these days. Ever since Mongolia gave me the collar.  
My neck keeps getting cut up in my sleep. So I walk around all night to avoid sleeping.  
General Winter and Viktor are always with me now. Surprisingly I've gained enough of Mongolia's trust.  
To be allowed to wander into my land. It seems like forever since I was last here, but not much has changed.  
My land is as beautiful as the night sky. However I'm not able to fully enjoy myself. Because other nations have started attacking me.  
They chase me all the time. I've tried using General Winter but even he's no match, for them.  
/It's not just you who needs to get stronger./ "I know Viktor." (That's why I'm out here so I can be close to, my people and gain strength. Maybe I can find Lithuania and play with him!  
"I wonder how much he changed and if he remembers, my promise." /I'm sure he does people never truly forget, things you know./  
"I know I just wish I was free. So we could be together." /Don't worry Ivan the day will come whey you'll, have everything you want./  
"I just have to wait and be a good boy right?" /Da it won't be much longer./ I sensed a nation before I could reply.  
Even though it'd be a while before anyone could hear me. I still stayed quiet as I, approached just like General Winter taught me.  
Soft like snow falling and conceal my presence. Until I'm close enough to see who, has decided to invade me this time.  
Whoever it is has clearly dealt with snow before. I couldn't risk getting to, close because the other nation can sense me now.  
But judging from the dark tents and lack of shouting. Either the nation is asleep or isn't interested in fighting yet.  
(Maybe we won't have to fight. Maybe we could be allies/friends!?) /Don't get your hopes up until you see, an ambassador./  
(I know it's just that flag is new. So maybe things will work out.) The flag was simply a black cross on a white background.  
That seemed to glow in the moonlight. As though it didn't want to disappear in the night.  
(I wonder if the flag represents the nation's personality. None of us want to die. But choosing a flag should mean something.)  
A slight movement caught my eye as someone slipped from, their tent. Then make their way.  
Out towards the forest not far from me. I couldn't see the person very well due to, the cape that billowed.  
Out in the steadily increasing wind but I could see. That the person is just about my size.  
(So that's the nation then I wonder if I've been noticed yet. It didn't look like it. The nation just seemed to be taking a walk.  
(Perhaps I'll tag along and introduce myself. First impressions are very important.)  
/What approach will you use?/ (I don't know yet. But I still want to follow for a while.)  
I could sense Viktor's approval. So I followed the nation as he went deeper into, the forest.  
I was about to call out when we came to a stop. I stayed beneath the trees and watched.  
As the nation drew out a sword then started practicing, swinging it. He clearly knew how to use it but he was far, from mastering the art.  
Not that I could talk but watching the pale boy. Move around trying so hard to, perfect his moves against empty air.  
Made me think I was watching some kind of dance. I don't know how long we stayed, like that.  
Him practicing and me hiding. But the wind was picking up again. A storm was approaching and I didn't want, to be buried out here.  
It seems that the boy had finished with his training, as well. He gave a salute with his blade then sheathed it, and turned around.  
I gasped when I saw his face and instinctively, covered my mouth. So he wouldn't see the little puff, of air but I could tell it wasn't enough.  
This ghost white beauty with blood red eyes had heard me. He put his hand on his sword but didn't draw it.  
"Who's there if you come out now I won't hurt you. You have my word." (Wow he's so tiny but he can use his words, just like Mongolia.)  
Why did this stranger remind him of Mongolia? /Are you going to answer him?/ (I don't know if I should trust, him just yet.)  
/Tell him to put his swords on the ground./ I was about to do as Viktor said. When the boy shook his head and sighed.  
"Must be my imagination no one would be out here. This late unless they had to be." (He seems to be disappointed Viktor what should I do?)  
Another gust of wind whipped around them. Making both boys shudder and hug themselves.  
I'd only taken my eyes off of him for a second to blink, back tears. When I realized that the boy had just disappeared.  
I quickly rushed out to where I last saw him and, checked the ground. For footprints and I did fine, some before the wind blew them away.  
(At least I know that I didn't imagine him but where, did he go?) /There's only one place he would've gone Ivan./  
(Da I know but with this storm will he even make it, back to his camp?) I didn't wait for Viktor's response as, I ran after the boy.  
Thankfully the camp wasn't that far and just before I, left the trees. I saw him standing at the entrance to, his tent.  
But instead of going into the tent he had turned around. I couldn't be certain but I think he saw me and maybe smiled!  
He inclined his head for a moment then went inside the tent. Time passed and eventually General Winter, found me and led me away.  
I didn't see the boy again until a few days later. When I was trying to outrun several, invading nations.  
He had joined them and I heard his allies. Call him the Teutonic Knights. Well that explained a few things but, what really impressed me.  
Was the fact that he truly believed his purpose is to fight. On the rare occasions that it's just our armies, facing each other.  
I find myself paying more attention to his eyes than his words. They held a strange light in them that always, tried to hide his feelings.  
But I found out in the Battle of the Ice. That isn't always the case with his eyes. Sometimes something else is revealed to stare back at you.  
Let me cast a spell for you. So you can see what I mean and maybe help me understand.  
What I should do about it. It's called the Battle of the Ice. But the part I'm talking about was more of a stampede.  
With a quick splash that wound up. With Teutonic Knights almost drowning. With a great deal of his men if I, hadn't pulled him from the river.  
"Well that was close." I admit his lack of thanks, irritated me. A lot of things had been irritating me and, this boy would at least.  
Learn some manners from this experience and also help me. To let off a bit of steam. I felt Viktor's amusement.  
As I straddled the knight and wrapped my hands. Around his throat and squeezed. "Mr. Teutonic Knights I want you, to listen to me as I'm choking you. I tried to warn you didn't I? Surely your not stupid about playing on ice?"  
"I'm sorry!" Poor Teutonic Knights face was quickly, gaining color. I could feel him try to move me.  
But I had enough rage. To make up for any lack in my, personal combat experience. I watched as his eyes went wide, and I kol'd.  
Relishing in my purple aura. As it enveloped me and made my vison go red I saw, something shift.  
In Teutonic Knights eyes that made me smile. I didn't know what to call it then. No one had ever looked at me, when I was kolling.  
With acceptance in their eyes before. Don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying that he trusted me.  
It's more like he recognized my needs. To let out everything I'm feeling and, express it with the kols.  
It was such a shocking thing. That I let my aura fade away. I stopped kolling and just stared at him.   
Teutonic Knights was still trying to remove my hands. But his eyes remained the same. All of a sudden something streaked at me and I felt something.  
Scratch my face hard enough to draw blood. I yelped and let go of Teutonic Knights. Which proved to be a mistake as he managed to knock me off.  
Then kicked me as he struggled to his feet. My face was bleeding but I wasn't, bothered to much by it.  
For some strange reason all I could think about. Was making Teutonic Knights look, at me again.  
But before I could stand a white kitten with red eyes, attacked me. I don't like hurting animals but this cat, was just as viscous as a hamster.  
Teutonic Knights turned and called out to the cat. "Come on just leave him!" The cat hissed a final time and obeyed him.  
I wanted to call out to him but I was suddenly exhausted. All of the adrenaline from the battle.  
Had run it's course. Leaving me with my heart pounding as Teutonic Knights, took the kitten.  
Into his arms and finally vanishing from my sight. /Aren't you going to pursue them if you hurry you can, catch them. Before he reaches the safety of his camp./  
"What's the point in chasing him when he doesn't, want me?" (Why did he stare at me like that? It's almost like he wasn't aware he was doing it.)  
I felt Viktor thinking of his answer but before he, could say anything. Something moved in the corner of my vision.  
A soft mew reached my ears and I turned myself around quickly. Covering my cheeks as I did just in case the cat, wanted another fight.  
It wasn't the same kitten though. It was a bit bigger than the white one. With dark brown fur except for it's neck.  
The neck was a white ruff that reminded me of a scarf. But what really drew my attention.  
As the cat came closer to me. Were the shining violets of it's eyes that matched mine!  
"Hi kitty do you want to be friends with me. Or are you here because of the white cat?"  
The kitten just walked over to me and mewed. I was still a little wary of it but after a moment.  
The kitten leaped into my lap and purred. This made Viktor laugh. /Looks like you made a friend after all what, will you call him?/  
"Koushko do you think Mongolia will let me keep him?" /If he doesn't let you keep him in the house then, he's a fool. Koushko clearly belongs with you and will, seek you out forever./  
Koushko started to purr even louder as if he was agreeing. "Well this day could've gone a bit better, but it wasn't all bad."  
Later that night I wrote in my journal. While Koushko explored his new home. I couldn't believe how cute he was!  
My cheeks had healed and Mongolia hasn't tried to test, me lately. (Maybe this victory pleased him or he's busy with China?)  
Either way I had beaten my opponent and learned something interesting. About Teutonic Knights and myself that, make's me smile!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The rise and fall of Teutonic Knights is next.


	5. Tuetonic Knights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some scenes from the anime/manga but the rest is mine.

The battle of the Ice was the last interaction between me and Russia. As soon as I got back to camp my boss ordered us to move out. "I've heard rumors that General Winter is still in the area. So we have to leave Russian borders. Before we lose the rest of our army." I was still soaking wet and my throat had started to hurt. So I did as I was told. As fast as I could so we could leave. General Winter might not be able to kill me. But I don't want to face him. So soon after almost drowning. An image of Russia's face when he was choking me. Flashed through my mind. As we started to head towards Estonia. I later found out that Lithuania had started to call himself a Baltic. Which is what Estonia and another country Latvia are called. (So does that mean that he's their family and if so. What does that make me and Lithuania?) I didn't feel like a Baltic. My body hadn't changed since the last time I saw him. So what does that make us? When we reached Estonia I started growing again. It wasn't like the painful way like when my name changed. But it wasn't exactly like a human way either. Estonia isn't like Lithuania at all. At times fighting him was just to easy. It wasn't that Estonia was stupid or weak. I don't really know how to explain it. Except that Lithuania is tricky. I wonder if he tricked me in the meadow that day. But as the years went by. I found myself everywhere in northern Europe. Even the Nordics, Hungary, Romania, and Poland weren't spared from my blade. Sometimes being a roaming order was the only thing that saved me. Time moves on and I find myself repeating the same mistakes. With nations and my people. I wanted to be friends with Hungary. When we first met I thought that since he started as a nomad. Then maybe our similar origins could help us be friends. I thought it worked at first when Hungary hired me. To help defend his land from the Cummins. But then he kicked me out. Just because my people were to good at fighting and a little excited. Oh well that Hungary turned out to be a freak. When I first met him he kept saying he was a boy. But then he told me his chest was hurting him. So I started rubbing it and... Like I said Hungary is a freak and she would've betrayed me anyway. Just like Vauti and Lithuania did by leaving me. Speaking of Lithuania I heard he married some guy named Poland. I hadn't been to that land yet but my boss was convinced. That part of the reason that these two had formed an alliance. Was so that they could defeat me and my people. Well we'll see about that it's been years since I last saw him. My body had grown so I looked like a teenager. My leader was pleased with me today and showed me some plans. For the upcoming battles with Lithuania and Poland. They looked good but... "Sir I thought we were focusing on Estonia. Are we just going to retreat and hope. That he doesn't attack us from behind?" "A very good question Teutonic Knights and let me assure you. That we're not just leaving our backs unprotected." The thing about my boss is that sometimes he scares me. He doesn't yell at me or beat me.  
But lately I've been feeling restless and no matter what I do. Nothing is good enough for my boss from me at least. My people pleased my leader greatly but that was only to be expected. My leader is human and wants to leave his mark on the world. I understand that really I do but why do I have to be trained all day. Only to be confined in my tent once I finished eating. This kept going until we met our enemies in battle. I wasn't the only one who grew. Lithuania was about my size. Poland didn't seem that impressive at the time. He kept saying like a lot and thought they'd already won. Just because I fought alone. My people fought well and I was handling the two nations just fine. But then Lithuania ran away and I was about to kill Poland when- Lithuania had snuck up behind me and ordered my surrender. "Like great job Lithy. But weren't you cutting it a bit close?" "Sorry Pol but it had to look convincing. Or else our friend here wouldn't have fallen for it." I'm not sure what happened next. My vision went red and my blood started roaring like a dragon in my ears. As Lithuania tried to get me to drop my sword. (I can't believe he dared to call me his friend!) Poland was reaching for my sword. I saw his hand moving slowly towards mine... But it never touched me before I realized what I was doing. I slammed the back of my head. Into Lithuania's head. Sadly it wasn't directly behind me so I didn't break his nose. But it was enough to break his hold. Poland got my fist to his face then I ran. My people were in full retreat and I had to stay with them. (Bad things happen to captured nations.) Mongolia had taught me that. I refused to be in a position like that ever again. If this Commonwealth thought they could break me. Then they would have to try harder. Sadly they did try harder and all I could do was hide in my fortress. Then barricade myself with my people. As our enemies surrounded us. The siege continued until fall came then they left in a big hurry. To tend to their farms and my people were safe again. Our lives had taken a turn for the worse. Victories have gotten harder to achieve and my people are restless. Things were about to come to a point of no return. When the unthinkable happened. Poland sent a messenger to the Teutonic Knights requesting help. In converting the land of Prussia. My leader agreed but only after he had claimed the land for ourselves. As soon as we converted the natives Prussia would be our new home. The thought of having my own land made me very happy. The only thing I didn't like. Was that I would have to serve Poland. Once the land was ours my people would have to pay taxes to Poland. In exchange for his "protection." Personally I don't think Poland will protect me. But the deal is to good to pass up. The last time my people were this unhappy. Lithuania was born and I lost people to him. What if something like that happens again. I've been hearing rumors about this kid. Calling himself Holy Roman Empire. According to this dick Austria he's our little brother. I haven't met him yet. But once we reach Prussia I probably will.  
It seems that Prussia is a very valuable piece of land. I wonder what it's personification is like? What will happen once we start fighting? The only thing I know for sure is that gaining land. Is the only way to keep all of my people. So I followed orders like a good nation. If Prussia had a personification I never sensed him. Perhaps the pagans never gathered together. Often enough to produce one. Or maybe the land itself was waiting for me. I know this sounds strange. But I've felt different ever since we started this campaign. No matter how many I converted or killed something inside me wanted more. Not the violence but the freedom to move as I pleased. Most of my life is dictated by my boss but on the front lines. There are so many things happening that I have to rely on instinct. Instinct and something else that I can't describe. Except as the feeling I got. When I was last with Russia and then Lithuania. This thing persisted even when I slept and made time blend for me. Even more than normal and then it happened. I felt the last of the natives either surrender or flee. The land of Prussia was finally mine and my people finally had a home. There was just one detail that no one told me about until it was to late. My soon to be King led me and a few others as an escort to Warsaw. Poland's capital to sign the paperwork and become recognized. Poland and Lithuania met us at the door and led me away. "Like wait till you see your new uniforms. You're going to look way hotter tonight!" "Po don't scare him Prussia is new to this-" "Yeah like I know Liet but that just makes it hotter!" "What are you talking about?" My leader told me to get along with them. But how can I when they speak in riddles? Lithuania smiled and took my hand. "Don't worry Prussia I won't hurt you this time." "Like don't lie to him Liet. As soon as he's clean it's go time!" "Po calm down your saying like way to much-" "We're here ok Teutonic Knights. It's time to purify yourself in our tub!" For a guy who likes to act like a girl. Poland's room is surprisingly normal. The only garish thing in it. Was a large tub filled with steaming water and flower petals. With a swath of white silk wrapped around it. "Why do I have to take a bath?" "Because your to filthy for my sheets now get with the stripping. The sooner your clean the sooner we can have fun!" (At least he stopped saying like but do I have to bathe in his room?) I bathed with my people before. So I didn't mind the bath. What I did mind was not being giving my new uniform so I could get dressed. "Am I supposed to walk out of here in a towel or my old uniform?" "Neither your spending the night with us Prussia." There was no more talk as Poland removed the blankets. Lithuania took the towel away from me. I watched them undress and look back at me expectantly. I barely know Poland. But Lithuania didn't strike me as a whore. (So this is what happens to weak nations. I belong to them so I must pay tribute. With resources and my flesh.) Lithuania took my hand and gave me a soft kiss. Then he led me to the bed.  
I got down on it and faced Poland. Who immediately took me in his arms and kissed me. It wasn't as gentle as Lithuania but Poland wasn't trying to hurt me. I was soon lost in a sea of kisses and wandering hands. I never had sex before but I knew enough to touch them back. It was starting to feel pretty good until a finger. Started to slip into my ass and I regained enough sense. To grab that hand and flip us. Over so I was on top of Poland. The look on their faces was priceless and the offness inside me. Reared it's head for a new purpose and I obeyed it. Later on I would feel bad for thrusting inside of Poland. Without preparing him first. But at the time... All I could think was it shouldn't matter who topped. Lithuania seemed to agree with me and didn't fight me. When I crawled over to him after cumming inside of Poland. He even helped me get hard again by rubbing it. Lithuania stared at me as I entered him and I guess Poland. Either wasn't mad or enjoyed the show since he just watched us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Death to Mongolia!


	6. Death to Mongolia and plans for the future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title says all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize if my history is wrong.

China is one of the most beautiful nations I have ever met. It's no wonder Mongolia keeps him close. What a shame I can't bind him to me. After we get rid of Mongolia but I can always see him later. After all he's my southern neighbor and our paths will cross again. But first I'm getting rid of this collar! "Are you sure about this Russia. I can always help you with it after the battle aru?" "Nyet China it must be now I want the yoke off of me!" I didn't mean to shout. But I had enough of being Mongolia's Bitch. China understood that since he's not better off. "All right just let me get some leather. So you don't bite your tounge aru." "Nyet." /Careful don't scare him away before he fulfills his purpose./ (I won't scare him that much he want's his freedom to much now.) I felt his hands gently touch the collar and forced myself to relax. "This is going to make you bleed do you at least have bandages nearby?" "Under the desk behind you I've been planning this for years China. Please help me with Mongolia one last time da?" "Don't talk like that your going to survive this aru." I said nothing as those talented fingers gently touched the wire. I couldn't feel everything he did. But once the collar came off. My neck was wet with fresh blood and I knew that once it been cleaned. It would be a mess of scars but that didn't matter. The scarf Ukraine gave me rarely leaves me neck even when I'm inside. My bare neck is a symbol of my resolve in this fight. "Thank you China." "Shut up I'm going to clean your neck. Then we'll go after Mongolia. Just remember your promise aru." "Da." Of course I'll keep it I want China to like me after all. Once Mongolia is dead we'll go our separate ways for now. "All right your neck is bandaged shall we get started aru?" I stood up and put on my scarf. Then we left my room. No one tried to stop us from leaving the house. If they weren't in Mongolia's army. Then they stayed out of sight. Unless they wanted to be accused of aiding us in anyway. That's why we're still in Mongolia's house. To see if anyone is loyal to us. Sadly no one was brave enough to wish us well but I understand. Mongolia won't stop at a punishment if he wins... /He won't win your finally ready to be free!/ (Thank you Viktor.) The battle will start at dawn giving us little time to join our armies. I'll reach mine in time but China might be a little late in joining the fight. (But that just means we can try a pincer movement and get more supplies.) Truth be told I prefer fighting Mongolia be myself. China has every right to fight Mongolia too of course. But the death blow must come from me. "All right I'll see you tomorrow Russia." "Da tomorrow China." I didn't watch him take a horse. Then ride away at a gallop. The one good thing about living in Mongolia is that we know the land. Just as well as we know our own and my horse. Had been trained to fight as well as carry me swiftly despite my size. I've been gaining a lot of muscle lately and now I get to use it. When dawn finally arrived I had joined the front lines. I didn't have much time to study the plans.  
But once I got Mongolia alone... (Then my vengeance and our freedom will finally be ours.) /But first you have to get through his army./ (Not a problem my sword will serve me well. Oh look Mongolia has shown up!) For a moment we stared at each other while our emissaries. Met and had a brief conversation before returning to our leaders. "It seems the Mongolians will give us a chance to surrender. If we do everyone is free to return to our homes." "What will you do sire?" I can't go back to being Mongolia's prisoner. The man is clearly furious with me and China! "I say I'm not stupid they may let us leave but they'll take our hides. As we turn around and of course there's you Russia." "Me sir?" "What will Mongolia do to you?" "Anything he wants but I'll survive it." Mongolia is staring at me. If we give up now I'll have to walk over to him and I can't! "Russiya this may sound strange but I don't want that to happen." My leader gave the order for us to attack and the battle began. We fought long and hard but Mongolia stayed away. "Damn you get over here so we can finish this!" "Why are you in such a rush Russia. Can't you finish me off by yourself?" This made me kol and I started breaking my enemies. Instead of just killing them. Hours passed and I sensed China's presence. Mongolia sensed him to and began to attack me with more ferocity. "I don't care if I have help as long as I'm free." My sword sunk into his shoulder with a very satisfying crunch. I smiled when his blood hit my face. Mongolia grimaced and jerked away. He switched his sword to his good hand and attacked again. China was close enough now to join me. His army was already aiding mine. "No fair Russia I want personal satisfaction to aru." "If you want I can hold him for you. I only got his shoulder da!" China didn't have a chance to respond. Because an enraged Mongolia started screaming. "You ungrateful brat do you honestly think it's so easy!" "Da I do and I don't have anything to be grateful to you for Mongolia. From now on I belong to myself and my people." "Well said and I feel the same way Russia shall we finish him?" "Da." I let out another kol and China swept in on his injured side. Fighting with China is very exciting and quite dangerous. If I didn't know better I could swear that some of his moves. Were meant as a warning to me. Silly China needn't have worried. Right now I'm to busy enjoying myself hurting the one. That used me ever since I was a child. By the time we were finished. Mongolia was little more than a hunk of meat to rancid for dogs. I was about to cut off his head when I noticed his sash. (It can't be why would he have it here instead of it's usual place beside his bed?) I grabbed the dagger and saw the same blade that I had licked so long ago. "You know something I'm glad you didn't catch Maria. He would've been ruined by you." (Just like I was.) /Your not ruined now finish him off before China does./ I swung my sword and plunged it. Deep into his heart. We watched his body fade and his army fled in disgrace. I can't remember what Mongolia's face.  
Looked like in death. I've tried many times but that part always eludes me. "What are you going to do with that dagger?" "I don't know China." (Perhaps I'll pay the Commonwealth a visit. Or maybe I can track down St. Maria. I haven't heard about him in years.) "Russia it's time we say goodbye again our people need to rest." "Of course thank you China. I hope our next meeting is a happy one." "I hope so to goodbye Russia." "Bye China for now!" He left soon after that taking his people with him. The red snow is beautiful to me. (I'll never get tired of this sight Viktor.) /Nor should you now go with your people. It's time we went home./ General Winter made sure that the Mongolians didn't try to attack. So everyone made it home safely and time passed. After I made sure that Mongolia wouldn't trouble me again. I spent most of my time in Moscow. My people needed recuperation. I needed to get used to doing what I wanted most of the time. My leaders changed from time to time. But each one brought something new. The motherland was gaining in power and stability. It didn't take long for other nations to try to invade me again. But this time Teutonic Knights wasn't among them. Nor was Lithuania or Poland so I decided to look them up. Using our updated maps and records. I didn't like what I saw. (Viktor he didn't wait for me and I don't see any movement-) /That's because he has a new name look at the last paragraph again./ I did and for a moment I felt a mix of relief and jealously. Why should Poland have them. When I'm much stronger than him. /Look at it this way two of the ones you desire are in one place. You have time to liberate them from Poland./ (You don't want me to go after them now?) /Nyet first why don't you try to make the house full. By collecting the other Baltic states./ Not a bad idea and when I brought it to my Tsar. He seemed to like it as well. "Instead of being on the defensive you want to conquer?" "Nyet I want to make a family if everyone is one with me. Then everyone is a comrade. We'll all be happy together da!" "All right Russiya but why start with the Baltics. None of them will expand our borders that much. They're not a threat." "That's why I want them because they're so small. Especially Little Latvia he's just a boy still. The poor thing needs protection." (He looks like me when I was a child. If someone like Mongolia gets to him...) I won't let Mongolia have another nation. Between China and myself we'll make sure he never rises to power. My neck is healed and only my scarf is allowed to touch it. "All right Russiya since you want it so badly. But I'm afraid I must change the plan a little." "How so?" My Tsar smiled and took out some paper. "Since you wish to create a family why not become one. With Ukraine and Belarus first?" "Da I will live with them again!" This time my sisters will live in a comfterable house. With everything I can provide for them. Instead of living in a shack or wandering around. The frozen tundra to avoid being captured. I haven't seen them in so long. I wonder how much they've changed since last time?  
"I'm sending out envoys to see if they'll come peacefully." "May I write letters to my sisters. It might not help with the negotiations. But the messengers will return safely." "Of course Russiya that's why I gave you the paper. Feel free to use my office as you write." "Thank you sir!" My Tsar smiled and left me to write my letters. (Should I tell them about Mongolia's defeat?) /Nyet they'll already know about it./ (Ok then I'll tell them about my house and how much. I want to live with them again. Maybe I can get them to visit to!) /Da a friendly visit among siblings is called for. Once they see how much stronger you are. They'll be more inclined to stay with you./ Finally my letters were done and I gave them to my fastest messengers. "Make sure you give them to my sisters personally." "Da sir we'll insist on it." "You do that and know that if you fail. General Winter always need new training companions!" I liked watching them scurry away on their horses. With the rest of their parties. I can't wait to see my sisters!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for Prussia's first love!


	7. My Fritz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the ending but for the sake of the fic it must be this way if you have any questions feel free to ask.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prussia's first time bottoming!

For the first time in my life I wanted to kill a human. Not because I was ordered to. But because she has become my princess. Her name is Elizabeth and she just married the crown prince. Fredrick the great or as I like to call him. Fritz, Fritzy, or mine when I was alone. Which happened a lot more than I liked now. But what could I do? My king wanted his son married before he received the crown. So it's not like he loves her. But I don't know who he loves. The servants are convinced that he's in love. Which surprised me after the death of his beloved Katte. The king didn't seem to care. As long as he wasn't caught in the act. Even his bride knew his feelings. But no one knows who has his heart. I'm not sure why I care so much. Fritz is destined to be my king. It doesn't matter who he loves. As long as he continues his bloodline. Nothing else matters except making sure the kingdom prospered. That's what I keep telling myself. I've watched my rulers. Ever since they're born to see what they'll do. Fritz was no exception and as much as I enjoy it. The thought of watching Fritz's child. Made my heart ache. It got worse when I had to escort the tribute. To keep Poland off our backs. The man was determined to top me. But so far despite being under his protection. I've always ruined his plans. (At least he hasn't threatened me with it.) That was one of the good things about Poland. He didn't try to hurt me or tie me down. He didn't want sex to be painful. (If I didn't hate him for taxing me I might like him.) I had just got back from visiting Poland when a servant addressed me. "Sir the prince requests your presence in his study." "Now I thought he was still. Trying to please his father with an heir?" "He's currently in his study sir and would like to talk to you." "Very well just let me take care of my horse-" "Please sir I'll take care of your horse personally. The prince really want's to see you now." It was at that moment. That I realized that the man was afraid. I couldn't understand why but for his peace of mind. I handed over the reigns. I ignored his relief and headed for Fritz's study. Everything seemed well when I reached the door. I knocked and was told to enter. "You wished to see me your highness?" Normally I would try to joke with him. But once his gaze fastened on me. I understood why the man had been so persistent Fritz was angry. For the first time I saw rage fill his eyes. "My prince you did wish to see me?" He said nothing as he stood up and held out a sheet of paper. "Explain this to me Prussia." "Sir?" I walked over to him and took the paper. It was badly crumpled but I recognized Poland's handwriting. Now it's my turn to be angry. "Why do you have one of my letters?" "I told you to explain it now is it true?" "Is what true and how long have you had this?" "Are you and Poland lovers!" I couldn't answer right away. The question was so unexpected. I looked at the letter again. "I sleep with Poland as the tradition requires of me." This didn't please Fritz but it didn't make him any madder. "I don't understand."  
"As long as I belong to Poland I must share his bed." "That is the way of Nations?" "Ja and that's not the only rule but my prince. Why are you so upset by this?" I would've regretted asking if he was already my king. But the crown prince can't do anything to me. Except kiss me within an inch of my life. My hands went to his shoulders and I kissed him back. This surprised both of us. Fritz pulled back and stared at me. "Are there rules about this?" "Ja." "Do you want me?" "Ja!" I kissed him this time. Our hands wandered everywhere we could reach. I broke the kiss when his hands slipped underneath my jacket. To begin to undo my inner shirt and I blushed. When I saw how heated his eyes were and I laughed. "What's so funny?" "I just realized why I wanted to kill your wife." "Oh?" "I'm in love with you." "I'm glad you feel the same way as me. Because I don't want to stop." "Then should we go to another room or lock the door?" "Elizabeth locked it already. No one will disturb us." "You told Elizabeth-" "No she guessed that I was in love with you. Then when I found that letter..." "Sex with Poland means nothing to me." "Good because I'm burning that letter." "It won't change anything besides he was just making sure. That I understood what was expected of me." "I still don't like it and I won't share you." I took off his coat and kissed him again. Fritz seemed pleased with the change in subject. So he didn't fight or argue as I helped him undress. My prince was truly magnificent. But he didn't give me much time. To enjoy the sight before he removed my clothes and kissed me. Our kisses grew short as we trailed our lips and hands over skin. It wasn't long before I found myself on my knees. Gazing at my lover's cock before taking it into my mouth. My prince moaned and stroked my hair. I could feel him getting close when he pulled my hair a little. "Stop Prussia I don't want to cum yet." I released him reluctantly. "Tell me what you want my dear Fritz." "I want to be inside you my beloved will you let me?" "Ja Fritz." I started to roll over so my ass was in the air. But he stopped me and said. "Is this what you do with Poland?" "Nein I give myself to you and you alone!" I turned back to him so he could see the truth in my eyes. "No one has topped me and no one ever will." (As long as you live I won't let another have me. As long as I live my heart belongs to you.) One day I'll repeat these words. Fritz is to good a person to not hear them but right now. I want to hear the sounds we make together. "Please I can't promise I won't sleep with Poland again. But I promise that he'll never have me like this." "I believe you Prussia it's not like I can promise. That I won't sleep with Elizabeth again." He knelt between my legs at last. But I still had one last thing. "My human name is Gilbert Bellshmidt. Please call me that when you cum." "Only if you call me Fredrick." I nodded and kissed him as he slipped a finger inside me. I could tell he wanted to be gentle. But neither of us would last much longer. "Fredrick please I need you now!"  
"All right but next we'll do it my way." "Ja mein libie." He thrusted inside me and I wrapped myself. Arms and legs around him as tightly as I could. The pain did nothing to ruin our moment and unlike the times. When I slept with Poland. The thing inside me merely purred with satisfaction. (If this is what Poland feels like than I'm glad I waited for Fritz!) His thrusts grew more confidant when he found my prostate. But he started getting more desperate as time went on. "I want us to cum together Gilbert." I slipped one of my hands. Down to my length and pumped it in time with his thrusts. Fritz watched me in shock for a moment. Then grinned and placed one of his hands over mine. "Tease I can't believe you did that." "You loved it I felt you." He laughed and squeezed my cock a little. "So you wish to play a game my prince?" I wasn't sure if I did it right. But when Fritz winced as I contracted my muscles. In my ass and thighs I laughed and kissed him lightly. "I think this game ends in a draw Fritz." "Next time Gilbert..." "I can't wait for next time Fredrick but I have a request." "What is it?" "Next time can it be on a bed?" "You'll have to wait and see but rest assured my Gilbert. I intend to have you in every way!" I felt him cum and was a second behind. The high seemed to last forever and I didn't want to move. Fritz kept kissing my lips and body. I wonder if he heard my pounding heart? "I'm surprised no one thought to check on you." My prince stared down at me. With such warmth that I blushed. "I told you Elizabeth won't allow anyone to disturb us. Or are you worried about-" "I want to be with you always!" "Then I promise you that some day I'll free you from Poland. I'll be king of Prussia and you will be great!" "That sounds wonderful but right now my prince. I think we should get dressed. Elizabeth won't be able to shield us forever." "Very well my love but you should prepare yourself. I can't guarantee when we'll do this again. But I won't wait long." We shared another kiss and I watched him get dressed. Then when I saw him starring at me. I reached for my pants. Once we looked presentable and the room looked normal again. Fritz unlocked the door and sat at his desk. "I thought the door was locked from the other side." "It was but I have another key. Tell me more about Nation laws Gilbert?" "Basically we let our leaders handle most of the politics. Weak nations serve the strong in various ways. Depending on their relationship." "So you don't-" "I told you it depends on the strongest. Usually just signing some paperwork. Or beating them is enough." "I see is there anything else I should know?" "Not really just be careful of who you fight. The awesome me only want's to bed you!" "Agreed now help me work out a strategy to defeat Poland." It would be a long time before I was free. Every time I came back from Poland. Fritz would find a way. For us to be together and make love as often as possible. Being with Fritz always makes me happy. Except when I watched him die. My Fritz is King of Prussia and will die in our bed. At a ripe old age.  
I can't bring myself to smile anymore. Fritz had ensured that he will never be forgotten. By the world and me. His successor is ready to assume command. But no one will ever take Fritz's place in my heart. He'll always be the most awesome of my kings. The funeral was somber and respectful. I wore the uniform of the Teutonic Knights. To show how much I respected him. Several nations had arrived with their ambassadors. But I barely acknowledged them. That day belonged to my king. Once he was safely buried I locked myself in my room. Duty will be carried out. But right now I just want to grieve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time to meet the sisters and little Latvia!


	8. The begining of the Soviet Union

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title says it and I apologize for any mistakes in history also does anyone have any links to other origin/first meeting stories between Russia and the Baltics/Poland?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know there is no rape in this chapter Russia is trying to avoid being like Mongolia.

My sisters said yes and have finally arrived! Both of them had grown quite pretty. I hope I won't have to kill any men. In order to protect their virtue but as their brother. It's my duty and pleasure to help them. I ignored the rules of tradition. For the first time in my life I left my Tsar's side without permission. My sisters seemed shocked when I ran up to them. "I missed you so much thank you for coming!" I hugged them both to me and smiled at their laughter. It was Ukraine who spoke first. "Of course brother anything for you. "I'm just sorry you had to live with that man-" "Big brother I'll kill him for you!" When did Bela get so scary is this what I do to people? If so then I'll gladly make use of it. "Thank you but that won't be necessary." I glanced back to see my Tsar staring at us with amusement. I hugged them again and led them to the castle gate. Everyone else had started to go inside so I took my time. To give them a tour. "Once the meeting is over we'll have dinner in your honor!" (Am I doing something wrong they don't seem very happy?) /It's probably due to their leader's feelings about this union. Don't let it bother you Ivan your sisters love you./ I nodded and turned my attention to my sisters again. "So did you get my letters. I'm sorry I couldn't write more." Belarus was quick to reassure me. "Not at all big brother your letters were like gems to me. But there is one thing you never sent me..." "What?" (I barely had anything that was mine back then. What could she be talking about?) Belarus smiled and took my hands in hers. A light purple aura very similar to mine surrounded her and she said. "Big brother you've been a man for a while now haven't you?" "Da but I would never let you visit me there. Mongolia would have hurt both of you. Please understand Mongolia was very bad." /Ivan run./ (Why Belarus isn't going to hurt me?) /Nyet she's going to do something much worse. Now get away from her!/ Thankfully my Tsar came to my rescue. So I didn't have to hurt Belarus or anger Viktor. "Come along please Russiya." "Da sir we'll be right there now Bela I don't know what you mean. By sending you something but let me make it up to you after dinner." "Really!?" "Da sister and Ukraine the same goes to you. Whatever I did to make you seem weary. I'll make it up to you." "Brother dear you don't need-" "Of course if that's what he wants. But big brother ours will be special. To us won't it?" "Of course Bela just having you here is special. Now let's go to the meeting da?" Belarus had an odd look on her face. But she said nothing more as we took our places at the meeting. At first it was boring but then Ukraine's ambassador asked. "We've heard that you plan on acquiring new territory. If we join you who will we go after?" "The Baltic states." I love how my Tsar can speak so plainly and make an impact. That captures everyone's attention regardless of their desires. As the meeting went on I watched my sisters as my Tsar. Laid out a few basic plans for the future. Until they joined the union. We could not go into details but it was enough.  
By the time the meeting was over everyone seemed in good spirits. Nothing was official yet but I knew it wouldn't be long. Before they were living in the rooms that I had made for them. What really interested me was the wait and see approach. Once I have the Baltics in hand my sisters will join me. Without any more problems from their ambassadors. What a simple way to start filling my house. Dinner was a happy affair mostly. Everyone was talking and laughing. Except every now and then Belarus would act weird and almost kol. But she never did so I tried to ignore it. Ukraine was very...bouncy in everything she did. Which makes it easier to laugh with her. But she also cries easily. I won't judge because I used to be the same way. But both of my sisters have grown a bit strange. Just a bit though. Once dinner was over I showed them to their rooms. "I hope you like them and that you sleep well. If you need anything at all..." All of a sudden Belarus looked like she was about to scream or cry. "Big brother what about your promise?" "Oh the sending thing you mean?" "Yes big brother you said you'd make it up to me after dinner remember?" "Da and that's why I left you both something special in your rooms!" "I don't understand." "I made you some presents. Please go inside and enjoy them. Good night now I must return to my Tsar." Ukraine hugged me and lightly stroked my scarf. "I'm glad your still wearing it Vanya." "I rarely take it off big sister." She smiled and went inside her room. Belarus kissed my cheek and said good night. I smiled at her and walked away. My Tsar had my orders waiting for me on his desk. He said nothing as I read it. Then once I finished I asked. "Does this mean I can't have breakfast with them?" "Not yet but you heard what they said. Once we've proved our strength..." "I understand sir I'll leave immediately." "Please do and don't worry. Your sisters will be safe in your absence." "Thank you sir I'll expect a room prepared for him." "Of course Russiya everything will be taken care of." I nodded my thanks and left right away. Estonia proved fun to play with. He was very clever but ultimately surrendered before long. I decided to send him to my house. With General Winter as a guard. To prove how quickly I can move against my enemies. Estonia wisely said nothing. As I bid him goodbye. Little Latvia isn't as clever but he impressed me more. Because he stood up to me. Despite clearly being terrified. I could pick him out on the battlefield easily. Due to his size and constant trembling. (Poor thing doesn't realize how lucky he is.) The boy fought hard and even managed to wound me with his gun. But once he ran out of ammunition some of his men. Tried to distract me so he could get away. I always enjoy seeing acts of loyalty. But the brief time we were face to face. Only proved how much the boy needed this. I killed everyone that got in my way and chased him. Such a tiny thing he moves quickly. But his fear must've overcome his reason. Because we soon found ourselves at a cliff's edge. With the other side to far away to jump across.  
"It's to dangerous boy please don't try it." "What do you want from me Russia?" (Such a bold statement but we both heard his fear.) "You know what I want Little Latvia I already have Estonia. Soon Lithuania will join us as well." "I won't join you!" Nyet Little Latvia isn't like Estonia at all. Nothing prepared me for the next move he made. Instead of charging me or attempting to escape. He simply stepped off the cliff...who does that? (Perhaps the boy isn't like me at all.) I ran to the cliff edge. But I couldn't see him anymore. (Strange I don't sense his death so why isn't he screaming? Should I climb down there?) /Nyet he must be unconscious or hiding somewhere. Why don't you try baiting him instead?/ (With what?) In the end I went down the long way. Night had fallen and I didn't feel tired. So I explored for a while. The base of the cliff had lots of pretty trees and flowers. General Winter had left his mark. But if I dusted off the snow then I'd get a green present. (I wonder if Latvia likes flowers?) Just when I was about to return to camp I sensed him. The fool had meant to die but he got stuck on a ledge! It wasn't so high up that I couldn't reach it. But I didn't feel like making the climb. Just for the boy to hurt himself. I couldn't see him but he was somewhere above me. Judging from the terrain. The only way down is to jump. The only way up is possible to very gifted climbers. I could do it if I wanted to. But if he saw me...In the end I decided to wait him out. Once he started moving he would sense me. But he still needed to get down. Dawn came and I heard him dislodge some loose rock. If I squinted I could see the ledge. Latvia can't climb up to escape. He stuck his head out a little but I couldn't see his face. I did however see him begin to slide. The boy must be out of his mind. (He didn't even try to climb down what's wrong with him?) I didn't have time for anything else. My body moved to catch the boy. It was a very close call but I did catch him before he hit the ground. What I failed to catch was a tiny glass bottle. That fell a few seconds before he did and smashed into tiny pieces. There wasn't much liquid but I could smell the alcohol. (So he wanted a final drink before attempting death again? What a strange child I've acquired I hope he doesn't make a habit of this.) Latvia groaned but seemed to be unconscious. So I checked him over for injuries. I almost kolled at his broken arm. Thankfully his other injuries had faded to severe bruising. So his life was no longer in danger. I decided to show him mercy. I bound his arm to a tree branch and carried him to my camp. There was no sign of his gun. But he didn't have anything else on him. (I doubt he knows how to summon a weapon either. From what I've learned that's a skill. That comes from age and bloodlust.) /You shouldn't underestimate him Ivan the alcohol might've been misused./ (I know Viktor I'll watch him carefully as we head home.) /We're not going after the Commonwealth?/ (Nyet Finland shall be visited next!) Latvia didn't wake up until I reached the camp.  
He was groggy at first. But once he saw me he immediately made a fuss. "Let me go how did you find me!" "Stop that please if you fall. I'll drag you and I don't like being yelled at either da." Perhaps it was the pain or the fact that he knew it was over. Even if he escaped my arms he'd never escape me. Latvia winced and looked around but he stopped fighting me. "That's good I'll have a doctor-" "I don't want your help." The interruption was quiet but I still didn't like it. (I'll have to teach him his place as the loser.) I took him to my tent. I placed him on my cot and forced him to look at me. "Latvia you belong to me do you understand?" He glared at me but I saw his fear. "Have it your way then by the time we're home. You'll be begging for the honor I give you." He said nothing as I took out my pipe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time will have baby Germany!


	9. Baby Germany

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fluff chapter that shapes Prussia's future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love baby Germany I can't wait to see his origin story in the anime!

Life without Fritz was unbearable and it wasn't the sex that I missed. All right that's a lie but it wasn't the most important thing to me. Just being with him and being able to relax and be myself. While allowing him to do the same. That's what I missed the most. I can't wallow for to long though France and Austria. Have killed the Holy Roman Empire. Now all of his lands are being taken over. (I never thought that Austria would kill his former charge. He didn't even take his belongings. When he told me about it.) Even though I barely knew the brat I still felt his death hard. Unlike Vauti who disappeared Holy Rome had no chance of- Was that a baby crying who leaves a baby crying in a field? I didn't have time to worry about this. I had to join the fight against France. But I'm to awesome a guy to ignore a crying baby. It wouldn't do to leave a tiny thing alone. Night will soon fall so while camp is being made. I went to find the baby before it stopped crying. The poor thing had been doing it for a while. It's only a matter of time before something- The baby was a nation and another nation was guarding it. (That can't be it doesn't matter how old a nation is I-) The nation guarding the baby. Felt just like my...I'm running and I can't think anymore. So what if they hear me coming. If it's who I think it is-! The baby stopped crying just as I found it in some bushes. There was no sign of anyone else. (But I could've sworn?) The baby had been wrapped in an old cloak and was starting to wiggle. I didn't want to hear anymore crying so I picked it up. I could still feel the other presence but something told me. That this was all I was going to get from him. "Fine it's not like I wanted to see you. I just can't what happened to me. Be repeated on anyone else." There was no indication that he heard me except for the sense of loss. That filled the air as he disappeared from me again. "Coward and what am I supposed to do with you hmm?" The baby was wiggling again. So I drew the cloak away. (Crap he's got the biggest blue eyes I've ever seen and that hair!) I was holding a tiny Holy Rome in my arms. But he didn't feel like him what the hell is going on? The baby reached out a tiny hand for my face and smiled. I brought him closer so he could touch me. "Hello do you know how to talk yet and do you have a name?" "Hello I don't know but who are you and where'd that man go?" (Looks like I got a chatterbox on my hands and I get to name him too.) "I don't know he was gone when I got here." This seemed to distress him but he didn't cry again. "Did he say anything to you?" "Only to make a lot of noise and wait for my big brother." (Now that I wasn't expecting why would he tell him to do that? Any nation could have heard him.) "Are you my big brother?" He had a strange look in his eyes that reminded me of myself. I couldn't just leave him here..."Ja I'm the Kingdom of Prussia your big brother." This made his big eyes go wide and he smiled for me. Such a simple thing shouldn't have affected me so much. But everything about this felt right. Making this boy happy is the most natural thing to me.  
(I can't take him with me the poor thing can't walk yet.) "Um big brother?" "Ja?" "I'm hungry are we going to eat soon?" "Ja my camp isn't very far from here. After we eat I'll have to decide what to do with you." He looked confused but he nodded. As I carried him to camp I felt his tiny hands cling to my shirt. "What's wrong are you scared I'm going to drop you?" "Nein I'm just not used to being held that's all." "Well until you can walk this will have to do." "Does that mean you'll stop holding me?" "I'll hold you as often as you want whenever I can. Are you sure you don't have a name?" "The man called me Rhineland." "Then why didn't you say so?" "Because I don't like it I don't want to be Rhineland." "Then who do you want to be?" "Germany." I didn't know what to say to that but I did understand. Confederation of the Rhine belongs to France. But he's clearly a Germanic nation like me I knew France fairly well. The guy had a habit of calling me his friend. He also grabbed mine and my king's ass and he wouldn't be satisfied. With the way I handled Poland. (If he captures me...) "Bruder?" "I'm sorry I know how you feel but I..." I looked into his eyes and knew I wouldn't fight France. Not until this child was safe. "I won't give you up without a fight kliener he'll have to kill me." "Bruder I don't want you to die." (What a childish thing to say.) "Don't worry no one can kill the awesomeness that is me!" We reached the camp and my new bruder. Was quickly made the camp darling. As soon as everything was finished and dinner was done. I had a messenger run back to my king. Asking that I bring the boy to our castle. Even if I lose a battle or two France can't come into my castle. He can't enter my heart and take the child away. Fortunately I was close enough for my king to reply quickly. But not quick enough to disturb our sleep. Someone had given me extra pillows. So that my bruder could have a bed of his own. (Hmm I need to think of something to call him. Not a human name or Rhineland.) "Hey little bruder do you mind if I call you West?" He looked up at me from his new bed and smiled shyly. (This kid is to cute!) "Ja West is fine but why can't I be Germany yet?" "Because your land belongs to France and-" "Can I belong to you instead bruder?" (What's the deal with this kid?) "Why would you want to belong to me wouldn't you rather be free?" "I would but your my big bruder if I have to belong to someone-" For some reason I didn't want to hear the rest. I picked him up and hugged him. "Bruder?" "It's alright I understand West." "Can I call you East then?" "Of course are you ready for bed now?" "Ja good night Bruder East." "Good night Bruder West." I placed his tiny body gently on the cushions. (Tomorrow I'll have to decide what to do.) I fell asleep quickly. A strange thing happened that night. For the first time in years I dreamt of Vauti. He was smiling and holding West. Just like he used to hold me when I was small. He leaned over and placed a still sleeping West. Onto my chest and I cuddled him. This made Vauti chuckle and he kissed my forehead and whispered.  
"You've come far my Gilshbet now it's time to fly my black eagle." "Where-" "Hush my son the morning comes and you need your rest. Your little bruder is already growing." "I can feel that but-" "Nein you must sleep now my son and you must prepare yourself. For the battles against the Romans do you understand?" "Ja Vauti but please-" He just shook his head this time. "Fight well and enjoy your life. My precious eagle and guard my new chick." He placed his hand over my eyes and started to hum. One of the old fighting songs. It was the best lullaby ever. When I woke up the next morning I found little West in my arms. Only now he wasn't so little and his clothes were different. (Well that's one less thing for me to worry about. I can worry about clothes later.) I decided to let West sleep in. As I left the tent to check on the soldiers and see if the messenger. Had arrived yet with my king's design and hopefully. A way for me to keep West safe from France. Thankfully my king understood the importance of my bruder. The messenger had run himself ragged but he was smiling. As he handed me my king's short response and I laughed. "Good work get yourself some food and rest soldier." "Danke Herr but don't you have a reply for the king?" "Nein if this works. Then I won't see anyone for a while." I sent the man away before he could ask anymore questions. My king had just given me a hard order to obey. But it would be worth it if I could keep West. Since everyone expected me to join the front. My absence would demoralize my soldier's. (I've never had to live with another nation and place them. Above my people but this isn't a bad thing.) My bruder is just barely starting out and our people are close at heart. Once he's grown up a bit I'll be able to rejoin the fight. (It all depends on how quickly I can get West to grow. If he learns how to walk today-) "BRUDER WHERE ARE YOU!?" (First I'll have to help him overcome his childish fears.) To be fair I didn't like waking up alone. When I was that small but I only had Vauti to cling to. For a very short time but West will have me for the rest of our lives. "I'm coming West just hold on while I get our breakfast." I noticed that everyone was acting. Like they weren't enjoying our conversation. (Good the least I can do is give them a nice memory of us. Before they have to fight France.) I quickly grabbed some food. Then headed into my tent to see West tangled up in his blankets! (This kid is to cute!) "Bruder?" "Ja West do you need some help?" "Ja." I couldn't help myself around him this boy made me laugh. I could tell he didn't like it. But he held still while I unwrapped him. "How did you get so tangled up anyway?" "When I woke up you weren't there. So I rolled over and tried to stand up but I kept falling down." "Well the important thing is that you tried. Do you want me to help you after breakfast?" "Ja bruder I want to walk around and explore." "All right but while we're eating I have something to tell you." "What is it?" "My king has ordered me to take you into hiding. Technically you belong to France but since I found you on my land..."  
West listened quietly as I told him about our future. He ate most of the food. Which made me happy. A healthy appetite is a good sign of his development. "Do you still wish to stay with me?" "Ja bruder but won't our names give us away?" "They would if we used them but since we'll be in hiding. We'll have human names. So what will you call yourself?" "I don't know what about you bruder?" "I've chosen my human name a long time ago. You will be the third person to know it." "So it's a secret then?" His eyes had lit up and I smiled. "Ja my name is Gilbert Beilschmdt now do you have a name you want?" "Well since we're bruders what else sounds good with Beilschmidt?" "You don't have to choose my last name West many nations choose their names." "But I want your last name bruder it sounds awesome!" "Of course it does I made it and you chose it. So how about Ludwig Beilschmidt?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter we'll see how Russia reacts to the new side of Prussia.


	10. Hello West

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pretty much everyone wants to say hi to the new nation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More cute German brother antics.

The wrath of Napoleon is over and Moscow has been avenged. Now all I have to do is find Prussiya. To make him attend the conference. It's been years since I've seen him but his people fought well. Despite all attempts to learn his location the Prussian discipline. Kept infuriating France over and over again. It was very funny to watch France get angry. About not having his rightful property. Personally I think it's just like Prussiya to spit on tradition. Keeping a nation that doesn't belong to you. Is a gusty move. Perhaps I'll try it sometime as a last resort. They do say keeping someone locked up. With only you to talk to is a great way to form a bond! /Da Ivan but make sure it's the kind of bond you want. Otherwise the person will come to hate you./ (I know Viktor I'm just excited.) Prussiya has been living like a human for years now. I hope he hasn't lost his edge. Otherwise this trip might be wasted. (I'm surprised that the Prussian King didn't want to tell me. Where his nation has been living all this time. I'm a hero now it's only natural-) /Ivan we're here this is the town Prussiya is hiding in./ (Thank you Viktor I sense them already.) It seems France was right about Prussiya. If I had to hide a child this is a nice place to be. The town was small but everywhere I looked I could see. Well kept houses and lawns. (Prussians aren't that different from other Germans.) I followed my senses and soon found myself in front of a farm. The sound of a dog barking and a child laughing led me to the barn. It was dark inside but before my eyes could adjust. I felt Prussiya behind me. "Guten Tog Russland what are you doing here?" "Privet Prussiya I've come to take you and the little one. To the Conference of Vienna. To decide France and the child's future." I turned and saw he had his hand on his sword but he wasn't glaring. "I have a letter from your king as proof for you." "Let me see it then." I handed him the letter and heard a voice call. "Bruder?" "West stay with there with the dogs alright." "Ja bruder." "Aren't you going to introduce me Prussiya?" "Once I've read your letter Russland. I'm sorry but I can't take chances." I watched him examine the seal before he quickly read the letter. Once he finished he looked up at me with an almost smile. "Danke Russland don't take this the wrong way. But why did my king send you. Instead of a messenger or came himself?" "Oh he wanted to but since I'm the hero. I decided that it was only right. That I return you to your king personally." "Is that so well then when is the conference to start?" "In three days now will you introduce me? I promise I won't hurt him." "Ja I know just wait here for a second we'll be right out." He walked around me and went into the barn. I could hear their voices. But I couldn't make out their words very well. (Something about leaving the dogs?) In another moment Prussiya led a little blonde boy to me. "Russland allow me to introduce my little bruder. West this is the motherland Russia." I smiled at the boy and knelt on the ground. But the silly thing turned shy and hid behind Prussiya's legs.  
(That's so cute and look at big brother. Trying to hide his smile.) "Sorry Russia your the first nation I've introduced him to." "That's ok it's very cute I can't wait to see how he acts at the conference." "Ja well we'll have to get him there first West let go of my leg." The boy looked at me when I mentioned the conference. "What's a conference?" "That's not how you ask a question West." "Nyet it's fine please Prussiya it's obvious this little boy loves you. If he's more comfterable behind you. Then let stay there for now." "Alright but you can't hide behind me at the conference West. A lot of nations will be there. You have to face them understand?" "Ja bruder but you'll still be with me right!?" "Of course I will so don't get scared. I'll always be right next to you West." (Viktor does he seem different to you? Where did my bloodthirsty yet understanding knight go? I don't think I like his eyes.) /You like his eyes and everything about him just fine. It's just that he's bound himself. To the boy just like he did with his king./ (His eyes are dull now-) /Nyet they are filled with love. He's been away from battle to long. But if we get attacked.../ (That's not a very heroic thing to hope for Viktor but I do want it. I want Prussiya to look at me just like he did back then.) /Give him time I assure you Ivan he's still capable. Of doing what you want when the time is right./ Little West is staring at me. I smiled at him and held out my hand to shake. "It's very nice to meet you West. Do you like riding horses?" He shyly took my hand and nodded. "Ja bruder let's me ride with him on his war horse do you own one?" "Da would you like to meet him?" "Only if bruder can come to." I can see why Prussiya loves him. Children these days are just to cute! "Of course come with me da!" The short walk was very pleasant and filled with short questions. I answered them with a smile. But my main focus was Prussiya. He had gotten his horse ready while I led the boy away. "Prussiya don't you have to get supplies?" "Nein I've kept some things out here just in case." "In case of France you mean it's a good thing the war is over now. It wouldn't do to have you become paranoid and timid da." "No need to worry about that Russia I'm still the awesome me!" "I see that's wonderful to hear shall we get going now?" "Ja I've already left money. With the people who live here as thanks." "But bruder I was supposed to play with the dogs today." "It's alright West I said danke. I can finally introduce you-" Prussiya stopped talking when he saw West's face. The boy clearly loved to play with dogs. "I'll make it up to you kleiner I promise." "Ja bruder." Neither of us liked the disappointment in his voice. But there was nothing we could do. The conference wouldn't wait for us. (West will have to learn this eventually. I wonder how Prussiya will react when he's an adult?) I watched the brothers mount their horse. Then I mounted mine and we left at a trot. The journey was pleasant and I enjoyed watching them. Talk and play together. (If nothing else he's clearly trying to be a good big brother. I wonder how he'll balance it out. With his true nature.)  
It only took us two days to reach Austria's house. The boy had been a natural trooper. But it was clear he needed a proper rest. "Austria should have our rooms ready do you think he's still awake?" "If he's not one of his servants will wake him soon." We headed to the stables and took care of our horses. "I can't believe you put your brother down. Long enough to tend your horse." "He was tired Russia." "That's not what I meant. But don't take it the wrong way it's cute." Prussiya simply took the sleepy child. Into his arms and led the way back to the house. "I've been here often enough. For them to catch onto my greetings." I would've liked to see his greetings but it seemed Austria beat him to it. For just as we reached the door it was pulled open. By a grumpy and impatient looking Austria. (Does he ever not look that way?) /Not when he's looking at Prussiya./ "Well if it isn't the mighty conqueror. How good of you to grace us with your presence Prussia." "Hello Austria can we come in now?" He didn't wait for an answer I almost laughed. As Prussiya brushed Austria aside and entered the house. (Poor Austria looks furious now.) But at least he knew how to treat a hero. "Please come in Russia I'm sorry but I have to make sure. That fool doesn't destroy my house. Or ruin that child." "Austria I just think-" "Pruben get back here. You can't just walk around my house. Whenever you feel like it!" "Keep your voice down piano whore you invited me here remember. Now tell me where my room is so I can put West to bed." "Aren't you going to-" "He's sleeping and I'm tired Austria. I'll introduce you tomorrow at breakfast. Now where is it?" I decided to follow them just in case my room was nearby. Knowing Austria he wouldn't want to anger anyone. By placing them far away or have just one of us. Farther away than the rest. (Judging by this exchange he might still do it.) Austria was still angry but he quieted down. The other guests stayed in their rooms. While Austria tried to salvage his pride. "It's right over here and the boy's-" "He doesn't need a separate room. He'll sleep with me while we're here." I laughed as Prussiya ran into his room and locked the door. Before Austria could say anything else about it. "Austria I would like to find my room now. Unless you had something to discuss da?" "No Russia your room is over here." He led me to a door that was farther down the hall. (Good I wanted to keep an eye on Prussiya.) "Have a good night Russia." "Thank you Austria I'll see you in the morning da." Austria just nodded and left me alone. I thought about visiting Prussiya's room. But changed my mind and went to bed. Morning came without incident and as I made myself presentable. I heard several nations in the hall. (Now what do you suppose Austria is trying to do?) /Perhaps he just wants to make sure. That Prussiya is still here?/ (Of course he is I would've sensed him leaving. Long before Austria did. Surely he doesn't fear Prussiya now does he?) /I think you'd better see what they're doing. Before we have another war./ I nodded and stepped out of my room.  
It seemed Austria intended to get his introduction before breakfast. Hungary, Briton, and a little girl were with him. I was about to ask them something. When Prussiya opened his door. He was about to say something when he spotted the little girl. Hiding behind Hungary's leg and he said. "I see I'm not the only one who needs introductions. Austria you've been holding out on me." Hungary gently pushed the girl. So she stood in front of him and dipped a curtsy. "Hello sir Miss Hungary said. That you had someone who could play with me?" "Ja I do little one wait right here while I get him." He stepped back into his room. Once the door closed Austria and Hungary relaxed. We didn't have to wait long for Prussiya to bring out the boy. As Prussiya made the introductions the children watched each other. Perhaps this conference would do right by everyone. It's obvious that Austria wanted to love West. Prussiya was clearly happy. To see West play with a child close to his age. But once the conference was over. I saw his true self in his eyes again!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WW1 and an end to innocence.


	11. Prussian madness stage 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Great War makes Prussia stay mad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if I get my history wrong this is to show Prussia as he battles more than one demon.

That conference was a complete waste of time. If it hadn't been for Lichtenstein playing with West- (I have to stop calling him that.) Today we celebrated my bruder becoming a man and finally being called Germany! The years had been hard but with this latest growth spurt. My bruder has become a man and now can experience. All the joys of the adult world. I know it's a double edged sword. But right now I'm giving him his first beer! My bruder's eyes have become less expressive. But I saw them widen! "Do you like it bruder?" "Ja may I have some more?" "Why don't you finish your glass. Then have some supper first." Ever since that conference I've done my best to see him trained. In the ways of being a soldier and a warrior. Now he's as tall as me but with more muscles and broad shoulders. I couldn't be more proud of him but now he's grown up. So our enemies will want to test us again just to see how much he's learned. The Great War came upon us not long after his first beer. I don't know who started it but I heard something about Austria. Maybe he ran his mouth off or maybe it's an empty rumor. Either way my bruder and I were pulled into it. Along with Hungary, Belgium, and Turkey to make things interesting. I've never fought alongside Hungary and Turkey before. We use guns a lot more than swords to. So many things are different about this war. (At least Russia isn't involved in it.) Revolution can seriously fuck a nation up and Russia. Hasn't been sane for a long time. I remember hearing about the Romanov's. Either Russia killed them himself or he knew they were going to die. I wouldn't want to be anywhere near him right now. Thankfully the war has taken us east. Towards France, Briton, Italy, and the upstart America. I haven't seen him fight in this war yet. But the would be hero always makes things more explosive. Which is good since bruder. Has gone to fight Italy. It won't be much of a fight from what I remember of him. (As long as he checks himself around Romano...) The last thing I need is to fight France and Spain. Not that I can't win against them. (But if Spain is protecting Romano?..) A shiver went down my spine as I recalled the last time. I saw Spain fight like that. It had been the first time we met. But I don't have time to drown in memories now. I have to find France and Briton. Before they cut off West's escape. (Not that he'll need to escape from Italy. He'll come back victorious. Then we'll finish the war and go home!) Lately I've been thinking that my bruder isn't happy with me. When the war started I asked him if he wanted to move out. So he could be closer to his people and live in his own land. (Maybe I imagined it but the look in his eyes...) He looked at me like I betrayed him but isn't it natural. To want to live in your own land. It's not like we wouldn't see each other again. (I'll talk to him the next time we're together. He's still young he must've misunderstood me. Whatever it takes I'll make it right!) France is a beautiful country I'll give him that. When Napoleon ruled he forced Russia to burn Moscow in 1812.  
It's truly amazing that he's still alive and fighting well. If someone made me burn my capital to avoid it being captured. I would've destroyed the basterd every time I saw them! But Russia has always done things his own way. Which is what I need to do. If I'm going to win this battle. France has been keeping a low profile lately. Is that because he's fighting with Briton. Or is he setting a trap? It wouldn't be the first time he's pulled this and knowing him. He'd think it'd be clever to use the same trick twice. (Well if that's the case then it won't work. I have to much riding on this fight. To wind up being captured now.) France hasn't changed when it come's to sex. He'll do it with anyone he thinks is beautiful. Briton still claims to be a gentleman. But giving his many interactions with France. Has made him a closet pervert. Either way I won't get captured. In all of my battles I've never had to kill myself just to avoid that fate. I won't start now when the threat comes from the frog and his gentleman. The fighting has begun to die down and the sun will set soon. But I'm not falling back. Until all of my troops are safe. America isn't the only one who can be heroic. Some of us have been doing things like that. Since before he was born. Not that I'm trying to compete with him or anything. The awesome me doesn't need to do anything. Except be me and protect Luddy! Someone moved just past the front line. I don't know if Briton uses magic when he fights. But I wouldn't put it past him to try it. Ever since America declared his independence. Briton has been desperate to win every fight. I suppose I can't blame him though. If Ludwig ever turned on me I don't know what I'd do. Following orders can only drive you so far. I don't want to fight my bruder. (It's a good thing there are still a lot of enemies around here. I can kill a lot of them. Before the rest run away!) I've been having a lot of thoughts like that lately. The thing inside of me keeps waking up and something's wrong now. Because it's getting harder for me to put it to sleep. It's like I have to kill a hundred people one day. Then I have to kill two hundred the next. If Briton and France don't hurry. I'll run out of humans to kill here and then what will happen? The most frightening thing about this fight. Is that I'm killing while I'm thinking about everything right now. My body has so much blood on it my uniform looks like a bruise. My face must've been caked in blood as well. Because when I finally found France and Briton. They stepped away from me. "What's the matter boys you look like you just woke up." Did I really look that scary? They've both gone pale. France still found a way to carry a rose everywhere he went. He held it out to me and said. "Prusse mon ami what has he done to you?" "Who are you talking about France I don't understand you?" It's to bad he tried to talk to me. Unless it's my king or West. Words just make it worse for the thing inside me is hungry. Since their troops can't help me anymore. I guess I'll have to take it from them. My vision can't get any redder and yet when I shot Briton.  
I could clearly see his blood. France dropped his rose and raised his gun- Only to drop it as my first shot went through his hand. Briton has already disappeared. Which is strange since I don't remember where I aimed. But I don't sense him and France is still alive. "Tell me something mein friend. Do I still look beautiful to you?" (Why am I asking such a ridiculous question. Who cares what this fool thinks!) "Non Prusse I can't see past the blood." "I can't blame you for that and I can't promise. How I'll look next time goodbye France." I shot him in the head and walked away. (Damn I thought for sure that another nation's death. Would've been enough for me. To put my monster to sleep.) Two nations and they couldn't do a thing for me. It's almost like it's crying out for something. Other than blood and victory. Life would be so much simpler if I could understand it. If I could talk to it then at least I wouldn't be so alone now. Without even realizing it everyone was gone. The remaining were only empty bodies who wouldn't be buried today. (My people and Ludwig are safe that's the most important thing.) No one should be dumb enough to attack me and if they did. I'd kill them before they could try to escape. My whatever you want to call it won't go to sleep anytime soon. At least the stars still look the same to me. Sometimes I worry about my inner monster. If it never goes back to sleep. Will I always crave blood, death, and victory? If so will I be able to keep Ludwig safe and happy? I never thought I'd get so attached. To love another nation is... Very different and in some ways more taboo than loving a human. In my heart he'll always be my little bruder. But to the world he's something different just like me. Only he's not like me. Ludwig doesn't have what I have. He's normal by our standards which doesn't affect my love for him. I just don't understand what I have. Or if I want another person to be like me. If I did meet someone like me and they tried to interfere. With my government or with Ludwig- (I'm not going to think about that.) No one will hurt Ludwig through me I won't allow it. I started to walk back to my camp. My people had done well today. The ones on guard saw me and let me in without any fuss. They knew I would barely respond to them. If at all right now. My tent had been untouched since I was last there. (When was that did I sleep last night. Or did I go hunting the enemy?) I can't remember what I've been doing lately. Except killing people and thinking about West. I did kill two nations today right? Why isn't this thing going to sleep or letting me sleep? Someone had left a bucket of water and a towel for me. I strip my uniform off and take the towel. The only reason that I bother trying to wash the blood off. Is so my presence doesn't affect moral. (Fritz used to help me with this...) He used to bathe me and bring me back to myself. But there's no one who can do that now. West is in Italy and my other allies. Wouldn't come near me if I paid them. So I cleaned my skin as much as I could then got dressed.  
I sat on my cot but couldn't sleep. So I looked at reports all night. Trying to form as many plans as possible just in case. I couldn't stay with my people. My troops have to be safe from me. I don't remember attacking my people while I'm like this. But I won't start now. Dawn comes and I force myself to eat. My body needs all the help it can get right now. Sleep is denied me and food is tasteless. Water barely quenches my thirst. When the war is over will I be normal again? Or am I going to be like this. For the rest of my life? Which me is better for the future and which will West prefer? (Ludwig has never seen me like this so the answer is easy...) Why does it feel like I'm losing an argument with myself? The war will end and I'll see Ludwig and everything will be fine!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter we'll see Russia and Viktor explore their madness together.


	12. Mother Russia's grief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The death of his Grand Duchess and plans with Germany.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes in history enjoy.

Why must children suffer so at the hands of the adults. Who should care for them. Because they are young and precious? No matter how many times I'm told it's for the good of the nation. I can't believe that killing her was a good thing. She reminded me of Catharine the Great. If the revolution hadn't come. Then maybe I could've saved her. /Ivan there's no point in thinking like this she's gone. I'm sorry for your pain. But you must accept this and move on./ (I know Viktor I just wish-) I couldn't finish because my tears are on her face. I've been holding her for so long. That her body has grown stiff and the blood is dry. I should at least make sure she's buried. But my new leader has other plans. /He hasn't told you everything so why don't we give her an escort?/ (What do you mean she wouldn't want me to kill for her sake.) /Da she wouldn't but can you live knowing her killer is still alive?/ I didn't need to answer that but we still had a problem. (How will I find her killer after so much time has passed?) /Remember about what Mongolia said about blood. Helping you find Maria? Take some of her blood and it'll lead you to him./ Viktor's words made sense but taking her blood. Even to find her killer seemed like a betrayal. Viktor just waited for me. Like he always did when he knew I had no choice. But to do as he says and ignore everything else. "Please forgive me Grand Duchess I never meant for this to happen." I didn't want to desecrate her body but the blood was dry. I gently turned her onto her side and drew my knife. Not the one I took from Mongolia. I would never use it on her. This knife is new and has a fine edge. That cut cleanly into her dress and skin. Most of the blood had traveled down. Away from the wounds to collect in her stomach mostly. I couldn't bring myself to cut her arms or legs. Anastasia wasn't a whore she was a good and clever girl. Who deserved so much better than this. Thankfully I only needed one cut. The blood slipped out quickly and I pressed my mouth to the wound. There wasn't much left inside her. But it was enough for Viktor. /Well done now focus on her wounds and I'll take care of the rest./ I turned her back over and gently patted her hair. While Viktor said words that I could only hear in my soul. Unlike the memory spell. My surroundings didn't change color. But once I stood up I saw something that looked like blue mist. (Is that how I'll find her killer Viktor?) /Da the mist is the bits and pieces of himself that he left. No need to rush as long as you follow the spell won't fade./ (Thank you but he won't live much longer. I won't let him see another dawn!) Viktor laughed and I followed the mist. I was dressed in my new uniform so no one got in my way. I wouldn't have killed them. But I would've remembered their faces. Mother Russia needs to set an example so this doesn't happen again. Revolution is fine for other countries but not mine. I will never allow another Anastasia to die! But I will kill any naughty children. Who are to stupid to learn their place. Starting with the basterd that killed her.  
For the first time today I found myself smiling. My hat kept the sun from me. As I picked up the pace. The mist started to get thicker and more clingy to surfaces. Which I took to be a good sign. A couple hours later and I saw him. (The fool decided to celebrate at a bar. Should I drown him in his vodka. Or force feed him my boot until he chokes?) /Both are to good for him why don't you whip him instead? That way you won't have to clean anything./ (True and I have just the thing!) Crops were always popular but I never carried one that often. I could carry a whip. But I didn't want my family to fear me. I know they do but at least they've learned their lesson a little. Doubtless I'll have to return home soon to check on them. But right now I have a wretch to kill. /Perhaps you should bring him home with you. That'll get the point across to them./ (Nyet he'll stink up the place and Latvia will have bad dreams.) I was about to enter the bar when the man came outside. He didn't notice me and I took a moment to study him. The man didn't have any outstanding features. Except he wore a uniform similar to mine. All right that wasn't surprising but how could someone like this. Kill her and look so smug and drink vodka? I decided to ask him so I followed him as he headed for a bridge. Not many people were out this far. Since the fighting was still going on. Once he was under the bridge I called out to him. "Comrade have you brought vodka to share?" He turned around and reached- I hadn't planned on running at him just yet. But the sight of responding to "comrade." Made me very angry. He only had time to blink and I was in front of him. One of my hands wrapped around his neck. Tight enough to silence his scream. But not enough to kill him yet this swine doesn't deserve a swift death. I lifted him up so his feet left the ground. It only took him a minute to realize who had him. His fear made me smile and I slammed him into the wall. The impact left him dazed. But he still managed to speak. "Why I was just following orders?" "Da I'm sure you were but I don't care. You murdered someone who was precious to me." /Someone's coming shall I stall them?/ (Nyet they can do nothing to me.) Even if my new leader ordered my to spare this life. I wouldn't stop until I was satisfied with his pain and death. My crop was in my free hand and I showed it to him. "Have you ever used one of these before? I couldn't help but notice you only shot her." "Please I didn't want-" Crops are good for distracting people. My Baltics have helped me hone my skills. Thanks to their disobidinance. My blows drew blood and as the man tried to scream. I cut off his air a little more. "If you didn't want to kill her..." I pulled him close so I could whisper into his ear. "Then you shouldn't have done so." The crop was nice and bloody now. Clothes are no match for a determined nation. Some people have gotten close enough to see us. But their survival instincts are strong. Even if they had weapons they wouldn't stop me now. My rage over her death. Must be calmed with his death.  
I would've gladly offered my life but suicide doesn't work for nations. /It's all right she wouldn't want you to die./ (That doesn't make me feel any better Viktor. How long do we have before someone else tries to stop me?) /You should finish him now./ (All right I'm tired of cropping and choking him anyway.) I slammed him into the wall again. Then I shoved the crop into his mouth. Until it jammed his throat and I could only see the tip of it. "When you decide to kill someone. You have no right to beg for mercy da." He tried to take the crop out but I took his hands and broke his wrists. I let him fall to the ground and stomped on the crop. My boot wound up crushing his jaw as well but that was all right. Since the other end of the crop. Was now sticking out of his skull! I left him there and continued walking away from the people. No one followed me and no one tried to punish me as the days passed. My Baltics and sisters helped me keep our borders defended. While the Great War ran itself down but just before it finished. I came across some information that made my day. The war would soon end but France wasn't satisfied with the events. He would get Briton to help him separate two German brothers. I decided to wait and see if this plan would work and it did in a way. Once everything was settled Prussiya went to live with Poland. While Germany had to make clocks in order to pay France. For all the damage he'd done. I thought about liberating Prussiya. The "black eagle of the north" hasn't softened towards his "protector." But Viktor convinced me to wait once again. /It's still to soon for him to be one with you wait a little longer./ I haven't argued with Viktor in years and I didn't try to that day. Not to long after that I got an interesting visit from Germany. The young nation had recovered nicely. From the war and had an interesting demeanor. (So this is what happens when he's taken from his brother. He has been forced to grow cold and calculating. I can use that!) "Privet Germany what brings you to my side of Europe?" "I'm here to discuss a non-aggression pact. Are you interested Russland?" I was indeed and as I listened to the boy go over his plans. I couldn't help but feel amused. (Poor Prussiya has no idea what he's done.) /Of course he does he raised his little brother to be a fighter. Now the child want's to claim every Germanic nation./ (But I still want Prussiya for myself and Germany won't share.) /Think of it this way in time you'll have the world./ In the end I agreed to sign Germany's non-aggression pact. A few nights passed and we went to pay Poland a visit. I showed up a little after Germany but that was enough. Poland had so many bruises on his face. That must've affected his brain. Because he ran to me as if I was going to save him! I loved watching his face as I revealed the truth. But Germany wasn't so amused. "This is your last chance Poland tell me where he is." "Like I already did he went out for a walk. Prussia barely sleeps anymore. So why don't you go find him yourself!" This didn't please Germany but I found it interesting.  
I watched Germany continue to beat Poland. Once the other blonde stopped moving. I asked if Germany needed me for anything else. "Nein danke Russland I'll take Poland with me." "Very well please send my regards to him." Germany nodded and took Poland away. I would've liked to see Prussiya again. But I was content for now. Briton and France have declared war on Germany. It's to late for Poland and to late for Prussiya. Germany has interesting timing. But timing isn't everything and he'll learn that soon enough. (At least the Baltics are safe and Poland can't visit Lithuania.) /I'm surprised you let him visit in the first place./ (I wanted Lithuania to like living with me. The other two don't mind.) The next time I saw Prussiya things would be different. He won't be one with me. On a single night da!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next we see my take on the betrayal of Russia in world war 2.


	13. The price of loyalty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The inner monster won't go to sleep pay attention to the writing please.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is purely what I thought would happen if Germany wanted to take the Baltics.

(How many years have we lived together. Cared for and protected each other. I understand and I don't understand you anymore.) You've taken me from my house while I was trying to sleep. Somehow you've overtaken my government. What's worse you've forced your Furor on me- Just because Austria is the same as Germany. (It's not even close!) That doesn't mean that I'm the same as him. It's not that I care about Poland he deserved it. I warned him not to anger you. (But West why won't you say my name?) Even when we're alone I'm East or bruder to you never Prussia. The last time you called me Gilbert. Was when you asked- (Nein that wasn't a request that was an order. Just because he would ask me to do it for him. Doesn't change the fact that this is a test.) For the first time in my life my bruder doubts me... Well fine then but as soon as this is over. I'm kicking his ass! As soon as I kill Russia that'll prove who I'm loyal to. I just have to make sure he stays dead. Long enough for me to get away. (Easier said than done but this is the only way.) I've arrived in Moscow this morning to help West get the Baltics. Russia thinks I'm here to see if he'll join the Reich. He never will of course which is a shame but Russia is to strong. For this non-aggression pact to prevent him attacking us. (Is this going to piss him off more than when he burned Moscow?) Either way I'm already at his house and most of the nations know I'm here. (So how many of them will come to Russia's aid?) I knock on the door and Latvia answered. "Hi Latvia I have an appointment with Russia." "Sure thing Mr. Prussia I'll take you to his office." I nodded and followed the boy. According to the plan he would be gone soon. His fellow Baltics would see to that while I handle Russia. The office is on the second floor. But that wouldn't be a problem. The problem is sitting at his desk and grinning at me. "Privet Prussiya I'm happy to see you. Latvia you may go now." "Yes sir do you want me to bring some refreshments?" "Nyet little one if he likes. Prussiya may join us for dinner since it's almost ready da?" "I'll go check sir I'm sure it's almost done!" The door didn't slam but I could feel Latvia's panic and Russia's amusement. (At least the kid will be safe now.) "Danke for seeing me shall we get down to business?" "If you like Prussiya I assume Germany wants me to fight?" "Ja will you fight with us?" (If I convince him I don't have to shoot him.) "Nyet I see no reason to do that. With the way things are now." He's still smiling but the way he said that. Is both a warning and an invitation. (He's daring me to try to change his mind.) "Are you all right Prussiya is the Axis treating you well?" I sat down and smiled at him. "Ja they are now tell me what would you like?" "From you?" "Nein my bruder has given me authority to negotiate. What needs to happen before you join us?" "I rather talk about you." (There's the threat again strangely my inner demon isn't reacting yet.) I could see that I would have to choose my words carefully. "You have so many nations living with you. Are you sure you have enough to feed one more?"  
"I always have enough food to feed more." "Glad to hear it now tell me how are your roads at night?" "I can't have my guest driving all night you'll stay here da." "But then I'll be intruding in one of your beds." "Nyet it won't inconviance anyone I will personally see to your comfort. You will have the finest bed and a good breakfast to." (Is he flirting with me I can't tell.) "If I take you up on that will you be more open to joining us?" "Nyet a single night isn't enough." (So that's it then I have no other choice.) "I'm sorry to hear that but thank you for your time Russia." "Of course you are always welcome here." (Is that so let's see how he feels about me after the war.) I was about to leave the room. When he got up for the first time that meeting. He held his hand out to me and I thought I saw something in his eyes. But I didn't give him time to say or do anything else. My gun manifested in my hand and I shot him in the chest. Right where his heart is. Then I shot him in the head. Russia's eyes are filled with shock but I didn't stay long. I forced the window open and jumped. The snow cushioned my fall perfectly. Apparently gunshots in Russia's office means stay the fuck away. Because no one came after me. Until it was well past sunset. I was making good time in my car but the wind was picking up. (Not much longer it figures that General Winter would get involved.) My car won't be able to help me much longer. I don't know if the Baltics got away. But if they can't then they're no use to West. The border was still a few hours away when I crashed into a tree! (Either someone got ahead of me or Russia has uncanny luck.) Because a tree fell into the road just as I came to a turn. The crash didn't hurt me. Thanks to my inner demon. Unless it's something similar to breaking bones I just shrug it off. Until it gets worse or better. I know it's not the smartest thing to do. But I have no choice especially when Russia is involved. (If I don't make it to the border...) I start running into the snow. Time has always been tricky for me and with this situation. I had nothing to depend on. The road disappeared almost right away. (It's a good thing I don't have to depend on the road.) It's been a long time since I faced a Russian winter. But if I can survive one wet. Then I can beat one dry. Of course the time I was wet was after the Battle on the Ice. We were both younger then but it makes no difference. I have to get back to West to prove I followed orders. (I hope your ready bruder. Russia won't go down easy or stop at me.) Now that the non-aggression pact is over. Russia won't stop until he's beaten or satisfied. My people are strong I know we can win. (But I insulted Russia by breaking the pact like this. He won't stop with my people or the war. If we win he'll come for me!) My inner monster finally started to pay attention to my problem. As I continued to run. I felt myself smile and what remains of my sanity. Slowly fade into whatever my monster needed me to be. I felt nothing. Not my surroundings nor any emotion. I was just a vehicle for my monster and Russia was...prey?  
General Winter can't be killed but I could hurt him. I've never heard of anyone doing that but it can't be impossible. (Why is Russia prey when he's hunting me and did I just hear a "kol?") My monster had control of my body and it didn't stop running. Even when I knew I heard Russia. Or saw General Winter in the distance. It just shifted me to avoid the worst threats. I don't know how long I ran. But I felt it when Russia stopped chasing me. General Winter was still around but he kept his distance. What the hell is going on. I crossed a border but which one? This land reminded me of something but I couldn't focus on it. The monster was taking me somewhere. Towards another nation...!!! Warning bells flashed through my mind as an old memory resurfaced. (Not that man why would you want me to face him now?) As usual if it understood me it ignored me except this time I could've sworn. That I felt a dagger glide across my now overheated skin. (Was that supposed to be a threat or does it want revenge?) Either way my body moved towards him. I've never hunted a nation like this. Mongolia isn't an enemy I have no right to attack him. (Technically I had no right to attack Russia except on West's orders. But right or not it looks like I'm going to confront Mongolia!) It's been a long time since I've been considered a child. Mongolia had taken advantage of St. Maria. But Prussia is another story. Perhaps my monster understood that my fear has faded away. Or it knew that Mongolia had sensed me. Because the dagger feeling vanished and I slowed down. (Mongolia is headed for me. I wonder if he'll recognize me?) I recognized him right away from his looks but something is different. (Is it because our positions have been reversed?) The last time we met he was in control of Russia and China. Now he's just a bit of land sandwiched between them. Not that I'm in a better position but my relationship with West. Does make it better because I proved my loyalty. He didn't seem surprised or confused in any way which bothered me. I've changed a lot since I was a kid. How can he- "Hello again Maria you've grown into quite a man. It's nice of you to visit me but tell me. Has anyone else called you Maria recently?" Why the hell would he ask me that when it's obvious that I've come here. To pay him back for what he did to me. (No one else knows that I used to be Maria who is he talking about?) The monster seemed to react to his words but before I could focus on it. My gun was pointed at Mongolia's head but before I could pull the trigger. He said something that would haunt me for the rest of my life. "Killing me isn't going to help you child. The one you should fear is always hunting you because of me. The two of you are a matched pair." So there is someone like me which means this is all Mongolia's fault. He used some kind of magic on me and someone else but who? But the monster isn't interested in how or why Mongolia did it. It wanted him to die. So that's what happened and Mongolia just stood there. He's one of the oldest nations around and he just let me kill him.  
Just like with Russia and the rest my demon is still awake. What was the point in coming here anyway damn it! I don't know the land how am I supposed to get home? My feet had already started to move. When I heard a familiar piyo piyo. "Gilbird what are you doing out here little friend. Were you worried about me?" My bird cuddled up to my neck and flew away again. (He wants me to follow him all right at least I know he's trustworthy.) Gilcat must've been worried about pursuit because he kept his distance. But every once in a while I heard him meow. General Winter might've come close to us a few times. But he never showed himself. So does that mean Russia is keeping tabs on me. Or is General Winter acting alone? I wouldn't learn the answer for a while. Thanks to my friends I made my way back to my people. I was almost frozen but my awesomeness saved me. I was surprised to feel West nearby. Has he been waiting for my report I don't know if I can write it now. My people made me sit down next to a heater. While West made his way to me I expected him to be concerned or happy. But when I looked into his eyes they were empty and cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't resist killing Mongolia and in case your wondering. The inner demon heightens his senses and makes him more unpredictable. If you have any questions feel free to ask.


	14. Aftermath and War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russia's back and pissed but he'll get a nice surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes once again I own nothing except for the plot.

I hate dying it's one of the most annoying experiences in my life. But what really annoyed me this time. Is the one who killed me. (Or rather the coward who sent him and it was such a nice conversation.) Prussiya's face during the meeting and as he used his gun. Flashed through my mind and I couldn't help smiling. Once I got my hands on him. I'll have him make more faces for me. /Are you sure you want to chase after him something felt wrong./ (What do you mean I can't let that go unpunished.) /Nyet but did you notice his eyes for someone who hasn't been sleeping. He moved as if he were fully rested and alert./ (Da but that's not all you meant is it. There's something else that's troubling you.) /I wouldn't put it that way but.../ (This isn't like you Viktor but don't worry. Once I catch him we'll figure it out.) He didn't say anything else as I got up. I was mildly disappointed to see that no one had come to see me. It wasn't every day that I shot someone. The last time I shot someone was... Why is my house so quiet where are my Baltics? I can't sense them anywhere and no one had seen them leave.../Seems Germany has become a gambler how will you respond?/ (You need to ask I will take back what is mine and Prussiya! I won't hear any complaints from you Viktor I'm sick of waiting.) /Indeed perhaps this oddness is the key to our happiness./ (I'm glad you agree now let's find General Winter. He'll want to have some fun.) /I don't think you'll need to look he sensed our death. He'll be here very soon./ (Then we shall greet him at the door.) Night had fallen by the time I left the house. Prussiya had a good few hours to drive. But he hadn't reached the border yet. "General please make sure he doesn't leave. I don't feel like driving and it's a lovely night." He nodded and disappeared. /Are you sure you don't want the General to bring Prussiya to you?/ (Nyet I want to catch him with my own hands.) Ever since I was a child I preferred to do things for myself. Maybe that's why I chose to pull Teutonic Knights from the river. It would be ironic if he ran towards the river. But he's not that stupid. Germany must want him back as soon as possible. Otherwise he wouldn't risk driving. I don't need help in following the General. My protector knows what Prussiya is to me. (My future prize if I can get him and China to be one with me. On top of the nations under my control than half of the world is mine.) /But first you'll have to break them to your will. China has feelings for you because of your past. But Prussiya is another matter./ Since we've had this conversation several times. I focused on catching up to them. The General had done fine work with the tree. The car was useless and I had to concentrate on finding them. (He's making excellent progress. Is he even injured?) /Da but he's getting help from something and he's desperate. He knows what'll happen if he's caught./ (Do you know what 's helping him?) /Only that it's the thing you saw in his eyes that day. It's similar to me but it's different. We might have to rethink our plans./ (I don't care what he has as long as I get him!)   
Viktor hummed as I ran towards General Winter's presence. It took a long time to catch up. But once I did General Winter led the way. Prussiya hasn't lost his instincts for surviving harsh conditions. His black uniform helped him. Blend in and become another shadow. I thought about shooting him but that seemed childish. I let out a kol to see if he'd panic. But he never did. It took me by surprise when he went into Mongolia. (Of all the nations to run to why him?) I don't fear Mongolia. But I don't understand why Prussiya would go there unless... "General please keep an eye on him I'll wait here for you." "Very well but I won't bring him to you." "I don't want you to. Viktor needs time to get over his uneasiness." /Don't blame this on me I know the time is close but-/ (I'm not blaming you. We shall wait and see what he does.) The General left while I was speaking to Viktor. He came back in a couple of hours and said. "Prussiya killed Mongolia and ran away." "Is that all that happened?" (Did he try to recruit Mongolia or-) "They spoke for a few minutes and he shot him." "Did you hear what they said?" "No Ivan but it was clear that Mongolia expected him. He let Prussiya kill him." Why would he do that Mongolia isn't that weak. So what is he up to now? "Shall I go after Prussiya?" "Da General I need to speak to Mongolia." Neither of them argued with me as I crossed the border. I hadn't crossed this way in many years. But it hasn't changed that much. General Winter watched me leave then went to catch up to Prussiya. By this time the lucky fool would almost be safe. But depending on Mongolia I might let him go for now. This situation makes no sense to me. Why kill me and Mongolia on the same day? /It seems Mongolia has resurrected himself and has sensed you. Are you sure you want to face him now?/ (Da I don't fear him anymore.) /You fear something Ivan let's hope our enemies never learn it./ (No one will learn that secret.) I found Mongolia in his house. He hadn't changed at all except he no longer seemed in control. He also didn't seem upset or shaken up by being killed in his own land. By an unknown-(Wait did they know each other?) Mongolia didn't give me any more time to think about that. "Hello Russia what brings you here?" "What happened between you and Prussia?" (I won't let him control the situation once I have what I need-) "Is that what he's going by now judging by the name your related." "That's not what I asked." "But it's something you wanted to know. What's the connection between "Prussia" and myself." "Why did he kill you?" "You have a bad memory Russia. Do you remember your childhood at all?" "I remember everything now tell me the truth." "I did and I don't have to tell you anything brat. If you want to know both sides of the story. Then you'll have to catch him." His smug look made it clear how he thought that would end. "Why would I believe him?" "You won't but you'll listen." /Are you going to kill him he's not going to say anything else./ (Nyet that's what he wants me to do.) Copying Prussiya will only waste more of my time.  
I'll have to catch that eagle another time. Hopefully before the war ends. Mongolia waited until I was leaving his house. Before baiting me a final time. "Thanks for the visit Russia give my regards to Maria." He didn't lock the door and I didn't turn around. As much as I hated him. I had to focus on getting my people ready. The war was a long one and despite my capture of his land. My dear Prussiya remained out of sight despite his people dying. I decided to bring it up at one of the Allies meetings. Just to see if France wanted to get the joke. Sadly he didn't laugh or smile. Instead he chose to say what I've already figured out. "Since Prusse hasn't been sighted in years. Then he must be somewhere in Germany." As usual America couldn't keep his mouth shut. About his latest idiotic and heroic plan. Which caused a fight between him and Briton. France just watched and didn't seem to notice Canada behind him. While I turned my attention to China to comfort him. Ever since Japan attacked him my old friend has been distant. "China what do you think we should do?" "About which part Russia we already have Italy. The German brothers will fall soon Aru." (Then it will be Japan's turn and which of these fools. Will control the most nations?) I will have Prussiya that is guaranteed. But still I can't help feeling bad for China. If only he would be one with me. Then I could help him hold onto the rest of his siblings. Sadly he still refuses me but that's alright he'll come around. Once the latest fight ended a new plan was made. It would mainly consist of the American, British, and French troops. Storming a beach but I refused to leave it to them. "I don't have a problem with that plan. But China and I have come to far to be left behind da." China stared at me but didn't refuse. So I continued with my side of the plan. "It's very simple you'll be the distraction for Germany. While we cut off his retreat." Why must America be annoying? "Russia dude is this because you haven't caught Prussia yet? You know that other nations want him to right?" "Da I know this but none of you have captured his land. If I find him then he's mine da?" I love watching them flinch from me. My purple aura can make things go so quickly when I use it right. To bad it's not as effective to keep America quiet. "So it's a race then first to catch the Germans wins?" "Sure if you throw in the land as well." I can't lose here. None of the other nations wanted to argue. Since we all had an equal chance to find them. Though the only one who believed it was America. (Even if he captured him Prussiya would either get away. Or turn the tables on the younger nation. But if I get both...) The thought of that was very pleasant and they would break. Far more easily together then if they're kept apart. I could do it but I won't allow myself to become greedy. Germany is a coward who will pay. For his crimes while his brother...His brother will pay in a different way? When the meeting ended China chose to walk with me. We enjoyed an easy silence. Until he gently touched my arm and said.  
"I got a call from Mongolia he seems to be doing well Aru." "He's lucky to die only once this war what else did he say?" "Nothing about you he seemed more interested in the Axis strategies. I didn't tell him anything just in case he joined them." "Do you think he will?" "No Mongolia has no interest in the war. He's just trying to stir things up again because he's bored Aru." If I hadn't spoken to him myself I might've believed that. But Mongolia doesn't act like that. Just because he's bored. (Da this is one of his elaborate plans but who does he want trapped. Or is this his way of making sure I go crazy?) China doesn't seem to believe himself either but he says nothing else. "If he tries anything let me know right away China." "Yao." "Eh?" For the first time during our walk he faced me. "My human name is Wang Yao." I can't believe he told me that. Despite the years that he raised me not once did I think. He'd ever tell me that! "My name is Iva Braginski."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll see the brothers torn apart and more mindfucking.


	15. Captured! Freedom? New Life...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russia get's his bunny!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just one of the ways I thought of so please let me know if your interested in my other ideas.

Time sucks when you can't see anything. Pain is meaningless when it never ends. Every human death hits me like a tank. Why did I agree to it all when Russia's death should've been enough? Just like when you took me from my house. You didn't say anything and what's worse you did it all by yourself. It doesn't matter that Hitler demanded it. Ludwig my little West. My bruder has truly made us one so he can be a symbol of hope. While I am bound by the darkness. To suffer each time a German falls. (At least the last thing I saw was your face. I'll cherish that in the depths of my depraved mind. With nothing else to do my monster wins.) It's melted into every part of me and I feel sorry for the basterd. That's coming closer to my prison. My senses are all screwed up. But I can still hear someone walking towards me. (Maybe West came to check on me?) "Prussiya what did he do to you are you awake?" I didn't move out of shock why is Russia here? "Not going to answer that's alright. I'll get you out of there in just a moment!" (Why does he sound so excited and where is West?) Something made a jingling sound and I heard the door unlock. Why does he have the keys? West said he had the only set! Russia started humming and I felt his hands at my wrists. "My so many restraints to keep you here. I guess he fears you now da?" I haven't spoken in so long but Russia seemed to be in a chatty mood. "The war is over your brother is captured. So now you'll come with me!" The chains were the only things keeping me in one place. West made them long enough. For me to use the toilet. But I haven't had to use it in a long time. (Days?) So I was unable to stop myself. From falling into his arms. This made him chuckle and I felt him tilt my chin up. "What has he done to your eyes Prussiya that had better be a decoration." (How can his voice be so childish then be so threating?) He shifted me so my face remained tilted up. Then he peeled the bandage from my eyes and I opened them. But all I saw was darkness. Russia got quiet and stared at me. Russia's body grew tense and I could feel his aura but he didn't kol. He just rewrapped the bandage and I closed my eyes. "I'm taking you to face trial my comrades said they'd wait. So you'll at least be in the same room. Maybe you'll be in a more talkative mood da?" He picked me up and carried me bridal style out of the tower. I didn't hear or sense anyone else. (Why hasn't he hurt me yet?) I knew the tower was somewhere in the Black Forest. West wanted to make sure no one would find me. No matter how bad the pain got. My screams went unanswered and now my enemy. Is carrying me as if I'm an infant. I don't know how far he walked. But by the time I could sense other nations Russia's mood changed again. Since I didn't fight him he was content to hold me close. However as soon as we sensed the Allies his grip became painful and possessive. He didn't take me to the Allies though for some reason he brought me to... "Get your hands off my brother Russia!" "Be quiet Germany the loser has no right to speak like that. Especially with his condition da."  
I heard a door open and I was placed on a cot. "I'll have someone check your wounds and bring you food Prussiya. Maybe you'll be able to stand for your trial." West didn't say anything until the door closed and Russia walked away. Our cells must've been right next to each other. Because I felt one of West's hands gently touch one of mine. "I'm so sorry did he hurt you? East can you crawl over to me?" Maybe it's due to Russia's words or the monster sensing West. But I couldn't ignore him. Somehow I moved closer to the bars. My cot wasn't long enough to get as close as I wanted. But West seemed happy so I didn't slip off of it. We just held each others hands. Waiting in silence for our fates to be decided. Russia hadn't been gone long. (It hasn't even been 30 minutes.) When Russia came back with a chattering America. Who had to state the obvious. "Prussia dude you look like shit are you ok?" I decided to let West do the talking and save my strength. "What do you want my bruder needs a doctor." That was the wrong thing to say. For some reason Russia is furious and West just made it worse. "You don't need to worry about him anymore. The Allies have reached a desion." West's hands tightened on me and I allowed myself to shift closer to him. (I thought we had to attend a trial is that why Russia's angry?) America sighed as he revealed our fate. "We the Allies decided to dissolve Prussia. While Germany is to be governed by-" "Nein you can't kill him it wasn't his fault!" "Da it's yours Germany for brining him into the war. Just because you've hidden him away-" "You promised to spare him if I gave you the key!" (What did my bruder just say? He made another deal with Russia?!) I tightened my grip on West's hands and the other nations must've noticed. Because America tried to comfort us. "It's not that bad he's alive still." (Ja but for how long when will I disappear?) A million more questions crowded my mind. But America's next statement drove them away. "We also decided to give the two of you the time to say goodbye. So I'm going to unlock your cages. But don't try anything or-" "America don't spoil this for me just let them out and be done already." (Spoil what for him are they going to let Russia kill me?) America just sighed and I heard him. Walk toward us and a door opened. (Just the one door do I really look that bad? Is locking me up a waste of time?) America didn't want Russia to have the last word. "You have until we finish the paperwork so make the most of it." They left us alone and as soon as the door closed West was at my side. His hands were shackled but I squeezed myself into his arms. If this is the last time we're together. Then I want to be as close to him as possible. "I'm sorry did he hurt you I had to surrender when Hitler died. It was to America but Russia was allowed to see me. He said the sooner you were found..." (So he did make a deal to bad he didn't realize this would happen.) West kept apologizing and saying he loved me. While I couldn't say a word. All I can do is cling to him and listen to him speak. (Maybe I'll fade into his arms then we'll always be one. Just like he promised when he locked me up.)  
But I didn't fade or die and all to soon the door opened again. West went silent and I could feel his rage. But it wasn't just Russia and America this time. All of the Allies had shown up and West didn't let me go. I think France tried to be reasonable and calm. But West didn't give him a chance. Because of our situation he had no way to fight them directly. But he refused to hand me over. The door was close enough for him to drag me into his cell. But he couldn't get the door closed and the next few minutes. Were passed in a blur. As I felt hands begin to pry me away from him. I tried to cling to him and I managed to kick someone. When I felt a large hand push my head down. While someone began to lift West's arms. West was shouting something but I couldn't understand his words. Nothing makes sense anymore. Except that I was being pried away from him. Once I was clear of West's arms I was dragged away. I could still hear West fighting to get to me. But the person didn't stop dragging me. Until we left the building and I was lifted onto his shoulder. Only then did I realize who held me. But where is he taking me? Why am I being carried by Russia again when he'd probably enjoy killing me. In front of my bruder's eyes? I don't understand anything anymore. Russia stayed quiet but I thought I felt his aura a few times. But I can't tell if he's angry or not. Russia started humming and I think night fell. Because it started getting colder. (Doesn't Russia have a car most nations would've commandeered one by now. If he's not taking me to be executed then where-) We crossed a border and I knew it was mine but it was also... I tried to scream but I wound up coughing which made Russia pause. I tried to punch him but he just plucked me off of his shoulder. I felt him watch as I struggled. Then he finally spoke. "So you figured it out good then I'll explain. You and everything you have belongs to me. Once I get you healed you'll be part of the Soviet Union!" He pulled me closer and whispered in my ear. "You're going to be one with me East. Just like some of the other former Nazis!" His aura was suffocating me but he wasn't done yet. "Do you remember the day you shot me? My offer still stands but I'll wait for you "East!" The day has ended in the worst possible way Russia won't kill me. He'll do everything in his power. To break me and the way I am now... (I won't break even if he kills me every day. Sooner or later my monster will help me escape. I'll just take it a step at a time.) Russia seemed to be waiting for something but when I just hung limply. Having exhausted myself from moving. He gently touched my face. "How long were you in that place did he even bother to feed you? Well don't worry you'll be in a better place soon da!" (If only he meant to kill me then I'd be happy.) But instead Russia chose to cradle me in his arms. Maybe it made him feel like a mother. The rest of the trip was made in silence while I tried to keep still. But the cold only got worse. (Maybe I'll die and resurrect in my capital?) Anything was possible but I lived on and we made it to Russia's house.  
At least that's what he called while I shared the popular view. Of it being a prison locked in the middle of nowhere. Russia wasted no time on getting me inside. He carried me up some stairs then he called out. "Toris get the first aid kit then bring it to me. We have a new family member to patch up!" (Whose Toris and since when did Russia own so many nations?) There are so many here I can't tell how many are on each floor. No one answered him but I sensed an increased movement. When his words ran out and Russia kept going higher. He finally reached a room and entered it. He carried me into a bathroom and made me sit on a toilet. "I know you don't like me. But I insist you bathe before you lie down da." It seems Russia is no longer interested in waiting for a response. His hands went to the bandage covering my eyes. Then he started to undress me. I heard someone come into the room and call for Russia. "Sir?" "In here Toris start the water. While I get his pants off." Thankfully a bath was all he was interested in giving me. I felt his eyes travel over me. But his hands stayed professional. Once it was clear that I wasn't going to start bleeding. Russia put me into the tub which made me sigh. It had been ages since I felt hot water. "Da that feels nice doesn't it East. Why don't you relax while we get you clean!" Despite his words the bath didn't last long. Just long enough to wash my hair and remove a layer of dirt. The only thing I was allowed to keep was my iron cross.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting next chapter I'm going to try to make it a direct continuation between the p.o.v.'s. With a few exceptions for the timeline and the story.


	16. Long Recovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title says it and I own nothing but plot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes history wise but it's for the story.

I finally have my favorite bird under my roof. Now that he's clean I'll let Toris tend to his wounds. While I get the bed ready. /It's a good thing you broke Lithuania now you can use him as an example. Will you do the same to GDR?/ (Nyet I want him to heal first.) "Don't let him drown Toris I have to see if anything will fit him." I didn't hear his "yes sir." Ever since I reclaimed the Baltics and punished them. Lithuania has been very obidant and gave me his name. (Since I've insisted on learning everyone's names. We've gotten closer as a family.) /When will you ask East's name?/ (When he can talk I don't think it'll take long. His body is covered in bruises and his eyes...) If America hadn't been in the room I might've killed Germany. Despite my agreement with the others. (His eyes are so pale what if he can't regain his sight?) /Then he'll learn to fight while blind have a little faith Ivan. Your GDR is a fighter. If you let him heal and get him to sign-/ A sudden crash and a yelp had me back in the bathroom. To find East on the floor next to Toris. "Do I need to rethink having you help me Toris?" Neither of them are hurt and I know he wouldn't try to grope him. Just because they were married once doesn't mean they have feelings still. (Although the thought of them together makes my blood boil.) /What if they were on your bed waiting to please you?/ (That would be wonderful!) Toris rose to his feet and said. "I'm sorry sir it's just I think East figured out who I am." I looked down at the albino. Then I addressed Toris. "Get his clothes while I dry him. I won't have him wearing anything from his Nazi days." This made East touch his cross. "Da I should take that necklace from you but you've lost enough today. Just make sure you keep that in mind while you recover da." I was surprised to see East's reaction. Despite being blind, naked, and to weak to stand. He still fixed his reddish eyes on me in a glare. Daring me to try to take it I couldn't help but laugh. As I picked up the towel. "Don't worry I'm only interested in destroying Nazi things." /Like that Mein Kamph book you found in his house?/ (Da but he doesn't need to know I was there yet.) East kept holding his cross. While I dried him off and Toris got his clothes for me. Once he was dried off I dressed him in pajama pants. Then I picked him up again. "Sir what about his shirt?" "I'll put it on him after you check his eyes. The rest of his wounds have scabbed over already." Toris stepped aside and followed me to the bed. /You sure you can control yourself? East is just as beautiful even blind./ (Da he is but I want to try to gain his trust. If I can turn him against Germany...) Toris was looking at East's eyes and a medical book. I waited and watched East more than Toris. So many years have passes since we first met. Now that I finally have him I'll never let him go! Finally Toris seemed to be finished and reached for a bandage. "Well?" "As far as I can tell everything is fine. His blindness is a side effect of war." "Good you may leave now unless East wants something to eat?"  
He just shook his head slightly. So I let Toris go back downstairs. Once I couldn't hear him anymore I helped East into his shirt. "You may sleep for now. But first I want you to drink some water." He didn't respond or fight as I helped him drink. His military training served him well and I was pleased by his progress. "If you keep acting like this everything will be fine." As he drank I tried to reassure him that he had nothing to fear. "I won't lock you up and forget about you I'll-" East jerked his face away from the cup and I knew I said something wrong. (But I didn't say anything that wasn't true so I'll leave him alone for now.) "Are you sure you don't want anymore water? I'm putting a jug on the table that's right next to you. Give me your hand East." I smiled when he did and I brought it to the table. So he could feel everything on it. When his hand reached a bell that I placed there. I paused and moved it closer to him. "There's always someone on this floor if you need anything." He nodded and I let go of his hand. East took it and placed it at his side clearly waiting for my next move. "My office has been moved to this floor so keep that in mind da." (That's not entirely true but he doesn't need to know that. All that matters is that he rests and accepts his fate. While I close the cage!) I left him to sleep and entered my new office. It'd take at least 15 years for my wall to be complete. But the look on East's face will be worth it. (He'll be healed by then so I want it to look impressive.) /I'm sure it will but East might try to escape. Before you can finish it./ (Which is why I placed him right next to me. Even I would get hurt if I jumped from one of these windows.) My house has grown larger with the war. With so many nations under my roof no one will interfere with my wall. (Now which borders to focus on first...?) Time flies when I have fun. Before I realized it East was walking around the room then the entire floor. I insisted on helping him. Whenever he tried the stairs at first. But within a week or two he was handling the stairs just fine. The only things that still bothered me. Was his eyes and his voice. Or rather his refusal to speak whenever I'm around. Sometimes in the middle of the night while I'm working. I'll hear Toris speaking to him. But whenever I try to listen in all I can hear is a whisper. I could always ask Toris but it's not the same. (Even if he insulted and yelled at me everyday.) That would be better than the constant silence and sense of waiting from him. I've thought about punishing him but just like before the war. Viktor told me to wait. /Remember the thing that helped him escape you? It's still there let's just wait and focus on the wall./ I tried to obey him. But then something happened that almost made me lose my temper. It had been a few months. Since East mastered the stairs. I had finished my work and went to take a walk. When I saw East's door was open. I didn't sense him on the floor so I went downstairs. Everyone was in their rooms and East is still blind. He wouldn't try to escape yet.  
I was almost at the front door when I heard it. Someone was in the music room playing the piano. I don't remember East going in there before. But once I was in the room. There was no mistaking the silver hair. I listened to the unfamiliar song in awe of his skill. (I thought Austria was the musical one.) If he made any mistakes I couldn't hear them and the song. Was long and made me think of the past. (There are so many things I want to say.) The song ended on a melancholy note that lingered long after he finished the piece. I wanted to hear more but he stood up right away. When he approached the entryway I stepped aside and he paused. "It's me East that was a beautiful song. What is it called?" As soon as he heard my voice he walked by me. I grabbed his shoulder out of reflex and he shrugged me off. "Stop being rude I know you can talk." He tried to get past me again so I stepped in his way. When he bumped into me I grabbed his shoulders. "Do you have any idea how kind I've been to you?" (If anyone else had ignored me while I complemented them in my house.) East placed his hands over mine. Then did a strange thing that calmed me. He lowered his head and I felt his body tremble. (Is he crying I'm not holding him that hard. Even when he's beaten he never shed a tear so-) Someday I must really learn not to lower my guard around him. It's only the second time but it still hurt. East's hands were clinging to mine at first. We were standing so close I thought he'd fall into my arms again. But what happened wasn't nearly so pleasant. Without any warning one of his knees connected with my stomach. Then he jerked his knee into my face and tore at my hands. But I wasn't letting go so easily when he tried to kick me again. I twisted and dragged him down to the floor. He continued to struggle. So I punched him in the stomach and straddled his legs. So he couldn't kick me. I caught one of his wrists but the other one landed another blow. Right where I kept Mongolia's knife next to my pipe. As soon as his fist landed on it. East froze and turned his head. As if he was looking for the blade. "Enough." I punched him in the head and he lay still. When he didn't die I took him to the bedroom. (How to punish him when nothing makes sense right now?) I laid him down then took out some handcuffs. I cuffed his arm to the headstand. Then I stared at him for a while to see if he'd wake up. The sky began to lighten and I left the room. (It's the Baltics turn to make breakfast.) Normally I insist on everyone eating together. Unless they can't leave their rooms. Like East when he first got here but now... (For now I'll eat in my office and see what he does next.) Toris wasn't disappointed when he heard. The news of my future meals. But he did look worried when I said no food would go to East. /Perhaps he's not completely broken./ (Da but he won't try to help him.) The days when Lithuania would try to aid my bad children are gone. I don't know if he ever felt like helping East before the war. But when he brought me my food he asked if he could check on him.  
"Nyet he's being punished until further notice." "Yes sir will you be having lunch and dinner in here as well?" "Until I say otherwise da. Let the family know that I'm not to be disturbed." Toris nodded and left me to my meal. By the time East woke up I found myself in another war. The one that would give me China! My wall is done and as soon as East can see- A crack that sounded like a broken bone. Alerted me that East had finally woken up. There was no scream and I stood up and walked to the bedroom. I thought I heard him walking around. But he didn't come out. So I went in and was greeted by an interesting sight. East was facing the window opposite of me. But I know he heard me come in. The handcuff was dangling from his wrist. If it was broken that didn't stop him from using it. To untie the bandage from his eyes. I watched quietly as it fell to the floor. East turned around and opened his eyes then he stared right at me. (The color seems muddied somehow?) /Ivan it's looking at us!/ Viktor's fear made me take a step back and I thought I saw... Something about East change but then he focused on the handcuff. It appeared he did break his wrist and he did something to his hand. To make it slip out of the handcuff and held it out to me. "That's why West used so many chains. To use only one restraint is an insult Russia." "So your finally speaking to me?" He smirked and dropped the handcuff at my feet. "If your still waiting for my "answer." Then I suggest you hold your breath commie." It took me a moment to figure out what he meant. But by the time I did he went into the bathroom. "You shouldn't exert that arm-" "I'm taking care of it right now and you can have your room back to!" (Our first argument is about his body and a bed?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The new East get's to prove himself in battle again!


	17. A chance and a Name?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> East Germany makes it official.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry X-mas and enjoy!

I thought nothing could be worse than living with Russia. But after I took care of my arm. He immediately led me outside and into a car. (So he does own one but where is he taking me?) It took a few hours for me to get my answer. Once I did I felt my heart start to hurt. (Son of a bitch put a fucking wall between us!) I would've welcomed my demon's influence. Russia was somewhere behind me with the car. But nothing happened even as I reached the wall and touched it. I tried to find any weakness. But I couldn't find any way to break it or climb it. No matter how long I stood there with my hand against it. I wasn't ready to hear Russia come up behind me. When he was right behind me. He wrapped an arm around my waist and placed his hand over my eyes. I don't know how long we stayed like that. But once he started to pull me away. I started trying to get away from him but the basterd played dirty. "Careful or I'll break your good arm." "Let me go why did you bring me here?" He spun me around and slammed me into the wall and said. "Because this is the only way I'll get through to you. You can't leave!" My response came out in a heated whisper and a death glare. "You can't keep the wall up forever!" His eyes seemed to glow and he smiled coldly. "Da but I can keep you forever now let's go home." "Nein that's not a home it's a prison and I won't stay there!" "You will even if I have to break your mind." Russia started pulling me again. (It's more than just my arm I can't get away from him.) Once again I was forced into the car. Russia said nothing else as he drove me back. (At least I can see my surroundings my people are surviving.) Once we reached the house Russia waited for me to exit the car. Then he quickly joined me on the porch and said. "Come with me it's time we talked about the future." I thought about snapping at him. But I'm finally able to see and I feel almost normal again. (Maybe my monster was just a phase?) I followed him to his office. Once he gestured to a chair I started to feel a little more normal. "This looks like your old office. Tell me are the bloodstains still there?" "Nyet now sit down this will take a while." I did and he was right once I saw the paperwork. I made it take a lot longer than just a "while." "You want me to steal my bruder's land?" "Technically it was yours now it's mine and I want you to represent it." "What if I refuse?" The look he gave me made it clear this wasn't a real discussion. It's a script that he won't allow any tampering. "Then I'll forge your signature." "So in other words this meeting is a waste of time." "Nyet since you've been mostly behaving. I thought I'd give you a chance to make it official yourself!" He pushed the paperwork towards me and I looked it over. "You do realize I can read Cyrillic right?" "Da since your Russian now it makes sense-" "I'm not Russian and where's my capitol you dick?" "That isn't for you yet I might give it back to you. If you do well in the next war." "What war?" (Has something happened to West!) "An opium war." Russia went into detail and answered my questions.  
Which made me nervous. Russia never reveals everything he knows about anything. (So what is he holding back?) "Tell me what will happen depending on my choice." "If you sign I will give you a special place in my army. You will be treated with respect and I'll let you fight." "That sounds good..." "Da power, respect, and a chance to prove yourself-" "What if I don't sign?" Russia sighed and reached under his desk. To pull out some kind of leash. That attached to the neck. With dangling ends to bind the wrists to the waist. "When I go to war you'll be bloody and broken. In this harness you'll always be by my side." "I see I'll be an example to China and anyone else who messes with you." "Da now I've answered your questions will you sign?" "Can I have some time to think about it?" "Of course you have until you leave the room." (So I can sit here as long as I want but once I leave...) "Why would you trust me after everything I did to you?" "Because I understand you. War can give you a chance to escape..." I didn't see his aura but it was clear he wasn't fooling around. "I'll find you and I promise that whatever he did. I will do worse." "Why do you keep talking about him like that!" I hadn't meant to say that. But if Russia plans on hurting West in any way- Maybe my monster hasn't faded away. Because I don't remember standing up and slamming my hands onto the desk. But Russia didn't get mad. He just leaned over and took one of my hands in his. "Because I hate him and I won't let him hurt you again. I've wanted you for so long-" "Is that what you say to everyone from your past? Even if I sign my bruder will take me back!" "Only if you want to go with him." That sentence was spoken so softly that I almost didn't hear him. But I know what I heard and Russia had a point. (If I get my capitol back?) I felt Russia slip a pen into my hand and squeezed it. The paperwork will need my thumbprint in blood as well. "Where's the knife?" "In my pocket I'll cut you after you sign." "Let me do it." "Nyet this knife has meaning to me. I don't want you to steel it." (Why would I steel a knife when shooting you doesn't work?) I remember our last fight well enough. It makes sense that the blade I felt- A flash of childish dread filled me and I quickly sat down. If Russia was confused he didn't show it. He just sat there watching me. While I focused on the pen and paper. I don't know if it was my monster or not. But I signed the paperwork. Then I held out my hand and watched Russia take out the blade. (That doesn't look like Russian work and it's very old.) Something about it made my skin crawl. But I didn't fight as Russia took my hand. He made a small prick at the base of my thumb and I quickly rubbed it. Once my thumb was good and bloody I pressed it to the paperwork. Right next to my nation signature making it an official document. (I'm one with him now.) Russia beamed with delight as the blood dried. "Thank you for signing but there's one last thing I want. Since we're on the same side. Will you tell me your human name?" "Will you tell me yours first?"  
"Nyet but I insist on learning your name." "Is it a rule?" "Nyet but calling each other by name-" "Nein maybe I'll reconsider once you've returned my capitol." (I won't be like everyone else here. I'll play along only until I'm free!) The look he gave me can be called many things. But my compliance must've made him very happy. Because he just laughed. "Is that supposed to be a compromise you know we don't do that here." "Ja but you know what it means to just tell you my name." (Only when your worthy will I tell my name. Unless you tell me yours that's the only way your getting it.) I waited to see if Russia was done talking. When he picked up the paperwork I asked. "Is there anything else I should know?" "Da just because you signed doesn't mean General Winter will let you walk outside." (So don't try to run away just yet.) "I hear you so when do I get a gun or do I have to provide my own?" "When the war starts." He was smiling when he said it but something told me not to push my luck. "All right do you want me to wait in my room-" "I thought you didn't want it you said it was a cell." "It is but it's a nice one and I..." I simply pointed to the paper in his hand. "Ah I see you want to stay on my good side now that you've recovered. I was going to punish you a bit longer but you can wait in your room for now." I nodded and left him alone once I was in my room. I collapsed on the bed and tried to feel my monster. (Why did it let me sign?) The knife haunted me and my thumb was still red. But the wound had already begun to heal. Within a day or two it would be gone. (Maybe the war will start and I can lose myself in the killing.) Dinner that night was my first real taste of life among the Soviets. Listening to so many nations through a layer of floors. Was nothing compared to sitting in a banquet hall. Packed with nations on every side. Except my back since my seat. Is against a wall and I don't know why but I'm seated between Toris and Russia. (I don't know how he feels about me knowing his name so for now I'll just think it.) Russia seemed to be in a good mood and he joked with Belarus a little bit. The food was actually pretty good despite being Russian. I never bothered to taste what was brought to me while I healed. I just ate to make the process faster. 15 years without West... Toris spent most of his time talking to Estonia. But he did turn to me a couple of times. "How are you feeling East are your eyes ok?" "Ja danke Lithuania is it always like this at meal times?" "Pretty much Mr. Russia likes it this way-" "I also like to hear Russian at my table East." "Were you eavesdropping Russia?" Damn Toris must really hate being this close. He turned away from me as soon as Russia started talking to me. As usual Russia was smiling but I noticed that the nations closest to us. Were doing their best to pretend. That everything is fine. (Are they the ones he favors or are they like me? Bits of conquered lands waiting to be punished-) "I wasn't eavesdropping but I thought you understood-" "I told you already I'm not Russian. Nothing you say or do can change who I am."  
"Is that so well then what are you?" It didn't have anything threating in it and I had a response ready. But I just sat there and stared him down. My silence made his smile change. Into something that reminded me of someone but I can't remember who- "If your done eating let's have another chat in the music room!" Even though there was still food on my plate. Russia stood up and held out his hand to me. Since he wanted to talk I ignored it and stood up." Lead the way unless you want to talk in your office instead?" He just shook his head and started walking away. I reached for my plate. But Toris turned and smiled at me. "I'll take that for you East it's best not to make him wait." (At least I can still read you like a book.) The fear in his eyes made it clear that he did care for me. (It also means that Russia might punish anyone for any reason. If his mood calls for it...) "Thank you I'll try to clean my own mess Lith-" "You may call me Toris it'll be a lot easier if you tell him your name." "I'll do my best to protect you from my punishments Toris." I left before he could say anything else and ran to the music room. Russia was sitting at the piano with that damn knife in his hand. (Why does the sight of that blade make me feel so uneasy?) Before I could say anything Russia licked the blade. (Is that supposed to be erotic?) "How's your thumb?" "Healed why did you do that?" Drinking another nation's blood doesn't do anything. "To see if you remember the blade." Once again he reached for my hand but I didn't want to touch it. So I stepped back and right away. Russia stood in front of me. (How did he move so fast and why are his eyes glowing like that!?) "Since you refuse to give me your name how about I call you by an old one?" "I don't mind you calling me Prussia-" "Nyet I shall call you by the one Mongolia used-" The knife was suddenly at my neck. "Did he call you Maria or St. Maria?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Up next the war.


	18. Pandas?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We coast over the Opium War.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again sorry for any mistakes this is just my idea.

As soon as I said Mongolia I knew that I was right. The Black Eagle of the North started out as a healer. The same one that Mongolia tried to catch. The look in his eyes froze in a kind of scared shock. But then he blinked and it was gone. Leaving something calm and waiting. (Viktor?) /You knew this would happen when you said Mongolia's name. Now be very careful with that blade. Or else you'll lose them both./ "I would prefer a different one if you don't mind that one never fit me at all." "Is that right?" His voice is so neutral that it's like talking to a doll. One of his hands wrapped around my blade and squeezed it lightly. "How many lives do you think I've taken. If I tried to heal anyone they'd just die to." "Do you truly believe that?" "Of course because I'll kill anyone who isn't German." He smiled at that and I felt the blade move closer to me. (When did his other hand get on my arm?) He wasn't pushing very hard or trying to hurt me. So I relaxed my arm and moved the blade away from him. Surprisingly he didn't fight me and let me take the dagger back. "Why did you bring up Mongolia? I only met him once and it wasn't a real fight." "Lucky you but I will call you Maria when we're alone." "Fine is that all you wanted to say?" "Nyet Maria what are you?" "I don't know but Russia don't think for an instant that your safe." (Dinner must be over I can sense my family going their separate ways. Perhaps it's to soon for a confrontation with him now.) /We do still need him for the war and I think seeing him like this. Will give our enemies something to think about./ "I'm a man of my word Maria as long as you don't break my rules. I won't harm you will you still fight with me?" "Of course killing is the only way I feel alive anymore. Is this good night then Russia?" "Da sleep well Maria you'll get to kill again soon." He nodded and asked a final question. "How did you find out no one's called me that in centuries?" "When I pricked your thumb there was blood on the blade." "Are you some kind of vampire!" "Nyet Mongolia gave me this dagger and told me to clean it with my tounge. When I was very young." "Blood tastes the same-" "Not true that blood belonged to a nation. That he wanted me to meet. Because we're a matched pair." "A matched pair and how are we like that? When there's nothing binding us except for that madman's sickness!" "Is that why you killed him?" "I killed him to make myself normal and it didn't work. So if I were you I'd take a page from West's rulebook and-" "Nyet I'm nothing like him!" /Wow this is the first time you've gone soft then hard and cold. In a conversation without hurting anyone. I'm proud of you Ivan./ Viktor's words barely registered with me. The only thing I could focus on were Maria's eyes. (I thought they looked muddy before but they're glowing now!) None of the other nations in my family have done anything like this. Even when they would defy me and run away. (Once again you show me something new to crave.) Just like when I was choking him next to the river. I found myself wanting to keep him in front of me.  
So I could always see him like this. I reached out to touch his face and he jerked away from me. "Don't touch me I don't care what Mongolia wanted. I'm nothing like you!" This time I did nothing as he left the room. (It's not like I thought things would be better between us. But hearing him say that hurt.) /Just give him some time you have a war to win./ Viktor was right so I left Maria alone and once the war started. I kept my promise and gave him a uniform. Almost identical to mine. "This is proof that you answer only to me. I'll keep you close until the time is right." He nodded and accepted a gun. He didn't seem upset anymore and his eyes are normal now. But once the fighting started. I felt an odd sense of excitement from him. For the first few weeks Maria behaved himself and stayed close to me. Which is good because I did bring the harness. The idea of seeing Maria wear it is exciting but anyone will do. (Perhaps I'll put Yao in it on the way home. If he continues to fight me.) But I knew it was only a matter of time before he disappeared on me. No one was sure when he left or where'd he go. At this time America was making a fuss everywhere he went. Even if he brought Germany to fight off China. The odds of the brothers reuniting here are slim to none. (Unless America wants to steel him away! Since he has Germany with Briton and France...) But my eagle proved to clever and America never caught him! I was surprised to learn his location. For some reason he never left China. Maria had gone back to being a demon killing so many people. That his uniform was ruined with old blood. China had kept him in a small valley. He had to keep sending soldiers in because Maria isn't afraid to get shot. Poor Yao must've wanted to fight him personally but with the war going on... Having Yao by my side again made me very forgiving. Especially when he offered to lead me to Maria. "I'll give him back to you Ivan just please-" "Yao don't be silly he's not yours to return but you will lead me to him. I'll stop him in his killing spree. Then we'll go home da!" "I am home." I've heard those words so many times that I ignored them. Yao could barely walk but he wouldn't let me help him. Just like when World War 2 ended and when we became free from Mongolia. Yao and I walked the same path and this time... This time I have all of my favorite nations in my grasp. The valley was far enough that it took a few hours. For me to sense him. Once we reached the valley all I could see were bodies. "He let's us come in to retrieve the dead and wounded from time to time. But we never know when he's going to attack next aru." "How long has he been in there and whose idea was it to keep him here?" "It's been at least a few months and I don't know-" "So in other words your people are useless against him. Thank you Yao I'll be sure to keep that in mind. For the future da!" "That's not true if we could've blown him up we would've done it aru!" "Then why didn't you?" "Because he has hostages!" "Really well don't worry I'll go in and get him." (They must be important to Yao. So I hope he hasn't killed or harmed them yet.)   
/Yao might need to be broken if he did./ (Which is why I still have the harness, crop, and other restraints. In case they both give me a hard time!) The thought of having two bloody nations at my feet. Kept me entertained until I found Maria. He let the Chinese soldiers go and saved his ammunition. The valley had a lot of terrain that can be used for an ambush. But Maria stepped in sight of me in all his bloodied glory. "It looks like you've been having fun the war is over let's go home." "Did you win?" His voice had taken a dangerous and neutral tone. But he made no other move to attack. "Da we're victorious once again tell me what are you feeling right now?" "Why didn't America bring West?" I expected that question but it still angered me to hear it. "I don't know perhaps America doesn't trust Germany. Like I trust you." "You don't trust me your just using me to get what you want." I chose to ignore that. "China said you have hostages in here." For the first time since I got here I saw confusion in his eyes. "What do you mean the pandas over there?" He pointed to a small bamboo grove. Where I could just make out a small group of pandas. (Yao just let his love for an animal cost him dearly. I wonder what else he holds dear.) "I'm surprised they're still here will you come down now?" "Animals don't mind me. I still have some bullets left how about I kill you again?" I watched him point his gun at me and smiled when he didn't shoot me. "How about we go together and bring Yao home with us?" "Wow the war is barely over and you already have his name." "Does this mean I'm worthy of learning yours now?" "Nein at this rate I'll never tell you my name!" "Very well Maria now come here." (If he resists me one more time I'll beat him senseless.) For a moment I saw his finger on the trigger. Then he lowered the gun and smiled. "All right Russki I'll behave a little longer." "Thank you I honestly don't know what I would've done. If you had shot me." "You'd have come after me of course even if I killed you." I nodded and watched him approach. When he was close enough. I put my arm around his shoulders and led him to Yao. "See comrade everything is fine now. The pandas are safe." Yao looked relived and Maria said. "I like animals and I never kill them for sport. Is Japan here or did someone get greedy?" "My little brother is probably with yours right now East. America promised to let me see him but-" "Don't worry Yao I'll take care of it." (Nothing can stop me now that I've collected my favorite nations!) I was in such a good mood that I had Yao prepare a feast. He didn't seem thrilled at first but then a strange look appeared in his eyes. "Russia East is filthy may I give him a bath and clothes?" "Da please do I don't want our family to get the wrong idea of him." This seemed to amuse Maria. But he went with Yao quietly. I helped my generals with some last minute negotiations with America. To keep the brat away from our dinner. (He didn't bring Germany with him...) /Da and that's for the best Maria wouldn't have stayed in the valley. If Germany was anywhere nearby./  
Yao came back alone and checked on the food. "He'll be out soon it just took a while to find something for him to wear." "I hope he didn't give you any trouble." "No he didn't it's more of a-" "Give me back my boots you brats don't you dare put them in a fire!" We looked at each other then followed the sound of an angry Prussian. I couldn't believe my eyes or hold back my laughter. Yao had placed Maria in a beautiful red robe. That revealed his arms and legs. But what kept my laughing was the sight of him chasing a servant. Who had his still bloody boots in a death grip. While clearly trying to run outside with them. Yao laughed with me until Maria caught the servant. I don't think he intended to kill him. But Yao didn't want to chance it. He walked over to them just as Maria reclaimed his boots. "Why is he trying to burn my things?" "Because they were covered in blood-" "I was in a war of course they're bloody and any way I like these boots!" Since they belonged to me I decided to end the argument. "Just let him keep the boots so we can eat. I can't wait to see what you've prepared for us Yao!" That did stop them but Maria glared at me. As if it was my fault that Yao didn't like bloody things in his house. Oh well once we sat down to eat I found myself thinking of other things. Yao and Maria sat on each side of me which I liked a lot. /Belarus won't be happy to give up her seat./ (Da but I have a plan to fix that.) I was surprised that Yao would dress Maria up like this. The robe barely covered his main body. While his arms were naked as he ate. "We'll be leaving in the morning Yao do you have anything else he can wear?" "Of course I just thought you'd enjoy this for dinner aru."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be fun.


	19. It's Back?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prussia protests to much and the monster get's what it wants.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the red outfit doesn't make any sense I saw an awesome picture of Prussia wearing a red robe and I tried to describe it a little.

Note to self next time a nation you barely know offers you clothes say no. Or hold onto your old ones while you bathe and save yourself some time. Just to be clear there was nothing wrong with the robe. It's just that the sleeves and pants were weird. When I lifted my arms at all. The sleeves would fall back and if I moved to quickly. My pants acted like a long skirt. (Why do pants need a slit that goes up to my thigh?) Yao said it was to mark the occasion and make Russia happy. But he already looked happy and once we sat down. He mostly talked to Yao. (Which means he only wants to talk to me when he wants something. Or threaten me with something.) While I was fighting in the valley. I kept thinking about what he said before the war. (Mongolia had said he wanted me to meet someone. I guess he got his wish.) To be fair they did try to talk to me but I wasn't in the mood. It was nice to know that Japan was ok. (He and West can help each other.) Even though he took the hint to leave me alone. I kept feeling Russia's eyes on me. Since looking at him would've got him talking. I ignored him and dinner went by rather peacefully. "So do I get to sleep indoors or shall I scare some guards. To finish off my last night here?" The look on Yao's face was priceless. "Of course you can sleep inside but aren't you one with Russia?" "Yeah what's that got to do with anything?" Russia chuckled and grinned at me. "I think Yao is trying to use you to save his own skin East. Isn't it a pity I haven't taken that step yet?" (What is he-oh.) On the few times that France and I just talked. Without trying to kill each other. He told me that I was hopeless when it came to being seduced. I told him to fuck himself at the time but he was right. When it came to sex if I'm not on top. Then I don't flirt. (Except when I was with Fritz I enjoyed having him inside me.) I found myself smiling back at Russia. "Ja but you don't need to do that." Yao was starting to panic now and I didn't blame him. He just tried to earn points by dressing me up. In Russia's favorite color. "I didn't mean to imply anything-" "I'm sorry if I offended you Yao but I refuse to let Russia fuck me." I stared at Yao for a moment. To make sure he understood what my position with Russia is. "I don't know if he fucks anyone else. But I won't be used for that." I started to leave but Russia grabbed my hand. "You wrong me East I don't fuck everyone to be one with them. I simply invite the ones I desire-" "My answer will always be nein!" This time I was allowed to leave and I went to find someone. Who could show me where to sleep. Once I was in the room I tried to clear my head. But that proved to be impossible. (It's not that I'm afraid of Russia raping me...) If he tries to force me I'll fight him but something told me. It wouldn't turn out like that. The way Russia spoke to me before I shot him. That was defiantly an invitation and if he truly believed Mongolia's words. (Then West better get a move on and help me break the wall.) We made it back to Russia's house and Yao was made to sit in Belarus's seat.  
While she got to sit at the head of another table. I still don't understand the pecking order around here. But as long as Russia doesn't bug me I'm fine. Things stayed quiet until Fritz's death anniversary came up. Ever since he caught me playing the piano I've avoided the room. But Fritz deserves something more than just a passing thought. So once everyone was in their rooms. (Or in Russia's case the upstairs office.) I made my way to the music room and played the piano. Russia did have other instruments. But Fritz rarely heard me play the piano. While he was alive so I decided to play it to celebrate what we had together. (My dear king there's no one who can replace you!) The songs I like to play are never written down. Which makes each one special to me. Because while I play them I can feel Fritz close to me. My music calms me in a way that blinds me to the world. Which is why I didn't hear Russia enter the room. Once the song ended I knew I was in trouble. Russia placed both of his hands on either side of me. Making it impossible for me to stand up. "Tell me why do you do this in secret?" His voice didn't sound angry so I tried to talk my way out of there. "Because it's not meant for anyone here." "You play my piano in my house-" "Ja and it will never be meant for you so why don't we cut this short?" I turned to look up at him and he just smiled at me. "You amaze me how do you think I should end this?" "Let me go." I knew my words meant nothing to him. But I was getting tired of playing this game. Apparently so was Russia but as soon as he stepped away he said. "Do you fear he was right about us?" I knew he meant Mongolia. "Nein we're not who we used to be let's just leave it at that." "Can I be someone else to you. Since seducing you doesn't seem to work?" "When the hell did you try to seduce me?" "Only everyday since the war ended. I've tried different things from keeping you close to letting you fly in a blood rage-" "That's not seducing me and if it's sex you want-" He cut me off by kissing me and I felt my monster stir again. Russia pushed his tounge into my mouth and I bit him. Hard enough to draw blood and when he tried to pull away. I grabbed his scarf and pulled him closer. (If this is what you want then stay and take it!) Maybe he read my mind or perhaps the pain excited him. But he stopped fighting to escape and started kissing back. Once we finally separated for air. I smirked at how out of breath he was and how his eyes glowed. As he looked at me with hunger. My monster had decided it wanted Russia. So I decided to let it take control and enjoy the ride. (It's just sex and it's not like I can fight my monster anyway.) It bothered me that it responded to Russia. When he wanted to have sex. Instead of the usual violence but I can make this work to my advantage. I kept my grip on his scarf and made him stand up. "We're not doing this on a piano." I'm not Austria and Russia didn't care. He thought he won me over but I'd prove him wrong. Over the next few minutes our lips met and explored everywhere we could. Our clothes were ripped off and I almost choked Russia with his scarf.  
He didn't want it off but thanks to my monster I was faster than him. As soon as I saw his neck I felt something change in me. Not disgust or lack of lust but it felt familiar. Enough that I didn't waste words. I just lightly touched his neck and stared at him. Whatever he saw in my eyes made him smile and we kissed again. Things went well until our pants came off. I refuse to be an easy lay. We fought and wrestled each other until Russia pinned me to the wall. He lifted my legs and impaled me before I could move. (He's done that before I wonder who it was?) All thought left me as he started to thrust. I wrapped my arms and legs around him. Occasionally we would kiss each other but mostly we settled. On marking our necks and shoulders. I don't know if Russia has the biggest cock. But he has an amazing amount of stamina by the time he climaxed. I was just barely hanging onto him and my back was numb. From being constantly pressed back into the wall. Even my own release didn't faze Russia. With all the noise we made. I'm surprised no one came to check on us. (Deja vu or does everyone know what Russia sounds like when he's having sex?) My monster and I didn't like that thought. So as he came inside me I bit his neck hard enough to draw blood. This made him bellow in rage. But he didn't try to make me let go. Instead he rode out his orgasm and whispered something in my ear. I reluctantly let go and asked. "What?" "I wanted our first time to be in a bed." "How romantic do you have it in you for a second round?" He carried me to my room and the next hour. Made me see red in a new way. Sleeping with Russia seemed like a good idea. But my monster had other ideas and only permitted me to doze. While Russia nuzzled me and fell asleep. I watched him for a while. Seeing Russia like this in the innocence of sleep. Made me remember one of the things Fritz told me. (He said there was someone for me...) I don't know if I want Russia to be that person. Despite everything that had happened between us. I don't think I'll ever have his heart. My monster must've thought the same way. Because the next thing I know. I've got a lamp that used to sit on my bedside table. In my hand and I'm pounding it into Russia's head. The first blow cracked open his skull. But I kept hitting him. Until the pillow was drenched in bloody gore. I left the lamp on his body and quickly got dressed. Then I went downstairs and got my boots. My boots have served me well and against Russia. I'll need all the speed I can muster. Once I reached the door. I stretched out my senses to see if anyone was awake. No one was and my monster was anxious. So I ran out the door. I had no idea where I was going to go. Russia would expect me to head for the wall. But my monster led me in a different direction. Hours passed and as the sun came up I found myself in a forest. It was very pretty but I started looking around. There was something in the trees... A streak of white barreled into me and I found myself holding a wet cat. A white cat that I had told to stay with West. "Gilcat what are you doing here did something happen to our bruders?"  
He just looked at me and purred which I took to be a good sign. With Gilcat in my arms I found myself walking at a normal pace. Which made it very easy for a small yellow bird to land on my head. "Unless you have a message for me Gilbird get off my head." The bird gave a piyo and moved to my shoulder. Right where it connected to my neck. Once he was in his favorite cuddle spot I felt myself relax. Everything was fine with West and now I had a new problem. Russia believed that I'm meant to be with him and I killed him again. (At least he was asleep this time so maybe I'll have a day or two?) Gilcat meowed and I wrapped him in my coat as best as I could. "How did you get so wet and where is your ribbon collar?" I've stopped asking how my cat. Can appear anywhere I am. I have the most awesome cat in the world. He can do anything he wants just like me. (So how long can I avoid him?) Even if I escape to another country. Russia will just track me down and if by some miracle. I can avoid him until West can break the wall- (I can't allow myself to hope for it.) It's already been more than 15 years and Russia went through another war. Even if America demands that I be returned to West. The odds of Russia just handing me over were never high. (So what I need to do is avoid him. For as long as I can.) Maybe another war will start and he'll give up looking for a while. Or at least until he gets permission to use other ways to find me. Humans can't catch me like this but they can slow me down. Thankfully Russia has a lot of places with no one around!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the sex scene but don't worry the story isn't over yet!


	20. Questions and Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Russia starts figuring out how the monster thinks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual own nothing but idea.

What did I do wrong last night had been so wonderful and now... Now I have a headache and my neck has a new scar. (How did he manage that when all of the wounds from America healed?) /The thing inside him did that it wanted to claim us./ (Well then it won't mind when I return the favor!) I wasted no time in instructing my family. On what I wanted done in the house. Everyone promised to behave and the Baltics volunteered to clean the room. (To think he had enough energy. To smash in my head.) It'd be funny if it wasn't me and I could get last night out of my head. /You're overthinking it he probably couldn't sleep./ (So that makes it alright for him to kill me in my sleep?) /I didn't say that but it does make sense. For him to keep trying to kill you./ I could only sigh at that knowing he was right. (It just felt so good to touch him at last. He didn't tell me to stop-) /That's because he couldn't didn't you see his eyes glowing? Whatever he has inside of him wouldn't let-/ (Are you saying I raped him!?) Of all the things I've done that was something I never wanted. Even when my leaders said to make nations be one with me. I always tried other ways first. (I don't want to be like Mongolia!) /Your not he did those things to you because he enjoyed hurting you. What happened between you and Maria was different./ (But does he see it that way or was this all some kind of plan?) /Why don't you ask him when you find him./ I intend to do that along with a few other things. It's obvious that Mongolia had an effect on him. So I won't mention him anymore. The past doesn't matter as long as continues to defy me. From now on I'll focus on the future. With him by my side. (One way or another I will get through to him.) Once again General Winter sensed my death. "You seem to be making a habit of this boy." "Nyet General it won't happen again." "At his hands or within this century?" I ignored him as we walked together. General Winter has no need for vehicles and when I'm with him. His power helps me travel faster than the wind. But General Winter doesn't like helping me hunt like this. (He must be planning to punish Maria. For unconvincing him with my deaths.) I wonder if I should lock Maria up in my basement. General Winter hasn't shown any signs. Of being able to get in there. /Stop wasting time thinking things you won't do Ivan. Besides you know that doesn't mean anything. When it comes to General Winter./ (Very true but how can we find him out in the wilderness. I've called ahead and no one. Has seen him or tried to climb the wall.) /That just means he's taken a different way to reach his brother. Have faith in General Winter. You know he doesn't like wild goose chases./ I did know that but this sudden show of help made me uneasy. Still General Winter seemed to know. Where to go so I did nothing. Eventually we found ourselves at a very familiar place. "This is where The Battle on the Ice happened. Why would he come here?" General Winter ignored me and walked towards the river. Once there I saw him kneel down and pick something up. He turned to me and held out his hand.  
Knowing that asking questions would get me nowhere with him. I walked over and looked at what he found. It took me a moment to recognize it. Since it made no sense to find it here. "I know he has a cat but why would it be here? I didn't see his bird when I claimed him either." /Maybe it carries a message./ That seemed likely but then again cats are fickle. It chose to come after it's master. Instead of staying with Germany. (Is this another example of Prussian loyalty? If so then Koushko has a new friend to play with!) We were about to leave the river. When I noticed something stuck on the rocks. It was getting dark but I picked it up. (It feels like a ribbon...) A smile made itself known as I remembered one of Viktor's spells. (Will it work with an animal?) /One way to find out!/ General Winter followed me as the spell led the way to a certain cat. For a while it looked like the poor thing had to rest often. (It must've been attacked I hope it hasn't died.) I'm not sure how long we walked. Viktor's magic makes time act weird to me. But if it wasn't for the spell I wouldn't have been able to see when the cat. Must've met up with Maria and was carried away by him. "All right this is where he was but how do we find him now?" Maria's essence didn't show up very well. That might be because I followed the cat- "Boy living in your house has made you soft. If you can't follow the cat then you must follow the man. Or shall we leave him to freeze?" "Nyet that's to easy for what he's done to me. I haven't decided how I'll punish him. But I promise he won't be walking anytime soon!" This seemed to amuse the General but he said nothing. So I concentrated on my surroundings. (The cat is tired and Maria doesn't know his way around here.) So he's either going to set up camp or find an easy path to travel. Until he feels safe enough to stop. The river would help cover his tracks. But I had a feeling he'll take his chances in the woods. Time has made most nations accustomed to sleeping indoors. But Maria is almost as old as me. He won't let current comforts get in the way of his survival. So which way would he go? I didn't use any magic at first. Just because the sun was setting didn't mean it was impossible to find him. It just means that I have to be more crafty than him. Stealth is the way to go for now. But once I get close enough to sense him! (Then we'll see how he does this time.) /If I didn't know better. I'd say you like chasing him./ (Da because that means I haven't broken him.) /Do you want to break him?/ (Nyet I want his loyalty and his heart.) A memory of how he looked at me last night made me move faster. I wanted to see him like that again and I'll make it so. General Winter and Viktor remained silent as the night wore on. Once dawn came I knew that Maria. Had kept moving with the cat. So he'll be tired from carrying it all night. Where as I've just been walking like I used to do. (Plus I actually slept before he killed me.) Maria might've tapped that thing that Viktor is worried about. But since it didn't mind having sex. Then maybe I can use that against them?  
/Are you going to seduce him because I don't think it'll work./ (Nyet I have another idea.) Sadly it took a few more hours of searching. Before I sensed him and judging by the increased rate. Of him trying to disappear. Maria knew that the final part of the hunt had begun. I started to run now and I felt the General drift away. (So he's going to watch this time. Which means I can't lose Maria again.) If I do then General Winter might take matters into his own hands. (I can't let that happen. It could take years for him to regenerate.) /Careful he stopped moving-/ (Good I can try out my plan!) /Which is?/ (You'll have to wait and see da.) /You don't have one do you?/ (I have an idea of what my plan will be.) /Then I hope it works because things will get worse. The longer he stays out here./ (Agreed I won't waste time.) Viktor got quiet as I got closer to him. For some reason Maria waited for me. I don't think he had enough time. To set up any traps but he could be planning an ambush. So I didn't just run up to him. When he finally came into view. Maria was clearly upset about his cat which he held to his chest. While his little bird cuddled his neck. "Put them down Maria and I'll spare them." (Not the best choice of words but he likes animals so-) "Why do you keep trying to talk to me? If I were you I'd shoot my awesome ass first. Then worry about the animal's safety." "Because I like animals to and if you were me. Then I would have a weapon in my hand. As I prepared to defend myself." I let my words sink in and took a step closer. When he did nothing I reached into my coat and held out the ribbon. "This belongs to your cat da." "Ja it's seen better days though." "I'm surprised it looks like your flag. Shouldn't your brother have given you a new one?" "He did but Gilcat didn't like it." "Why not?" "Because he's a Prussian cat and that's all we want to be." "So if I give you a new ribbon?" "If it doesn't have my eagle then he won't wear it." "He has that much pride in a dead name but what about you Maria? Will you allow him to die out here. Or will you come back with me?" I was halfway to him already and I could see he knew I was right. Even if he got away again the cat wouldn't last long. "You know I have to punish you for running away and killing me. But don't worry I have a cat. He'll help take care of yours." "What about my bird he's not going to be cat food." "Nyet I'll take care of him now come with me." (This is almost exactly like when he hid in the valley.) "Why do you keep asking me that?" "Because a day will come when I won't have to ask." I stood in front of him now and he still didn't move. I felt bold enough to wrap my arms around him and he let me! "Talk to me Maria tell me about yourself. Why did you do this?" "You know why I'm going back to West and the odds increase when your dead." "Then why aren't you trying to get away you could've kept running." "Why did you want to have sex with me there are dozens of nations. Living with you and you have China-" "Come back with me." (Whatever drives him to act on certain impulses clearly want's this to happen.)  
/Not necessarily but it's not letting him run away./ Almost as if he heard what Viktor said. Maria looked up at me and I smiled at whatever hid inside him. It didn't respond to me. "Your squishing my cat." I looked down to see an irritated cat glaring at me. So I loosened my grip and turned around. "Let's go home." For once Maria didn't argue that it wasn't his home. I couldn't help being happy but I also paid attention to the animals. The last time I underestimated them cost me dearly. But just like their owner they came along quietly. (I'm almost disappointed but I'm also glad. This proves my idea is right!) /All you did was talk to him-/ (Nyet his other self is like an animal. It could only be tamed by one person. The person Maria loves.) /He loves Germany-/ (Da but Germany locked him up. That stopped him from fighting and regaining control.) /That doesn't mean he loves you./ (Nyet but the fact that he let me sleep with him. Means that it can be tamed by me. The next step is a crucial one-) /Do you have a plan this time or just an idea of one?/ (I'm sorry for interrupting you Viktor. I do have a plan and your going to love it!) /So tell me about it./ (Nyet I don't want to risk him figuring it out. Before I'm ready to try it.) /Will you at least tell me when you'll start?/ (As soon as we get back to the house I don't want to risk. Maria getting out of control again. Once I start he'll have no choice but to be mine!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will link to the first one!


	21. Names

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With this we come full circle in the story sorry for any mistakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title says it all.

If I ever find a way to talk to my monster I'm going to kick it's ass! What's the point of killing Russia. If I'm just going to let him take me back? (More importantly what's my punishment going to be. He has no reason to hold back now. But at least my friends are safe and Gilcat will be fine.) My cat buddy risked his life for me I can't let him die here. Gilbird let out a piyo and I chuckled. (My bird deserves a treat for being awesome.) Both of them have lost weight but Russia really did seem to like animals. So at least they won't be used in my punishment. It took a whole day of walking to reach the house. We only stopped to allow the animals to drink. From a small stream but we had no food. Even for ourselves so we moved on and once we were inside. Russia started saying kiss a lot. At first I thought he was talking to me. Until I heard a meow and looked at the kitchen. Where a brown cat with a white ruff and tail. Came running up to Russia. He picked it up and beamed at me. "This is my kitty Koushko he'll look after your Gilcat da." (Shit his cat is a lot bigger than Gilcat!) I've never had to worry about other nations cats before. Gilcat can fight his way out of anything. (But if he hurts Russia's cat and Russia gets angry...) Once the cat spotted Gilcat. I saw that it had purple eyes and it started to purr at us. "Shall we put them on the floor?" "Why not they'll have to get this over with." My words sounded good to me but Russia just chuckled. Once both cats were on the floor all hell broke loose! Gilcat jumped on Koushko and they started fighting. Russia didn't look concerned and I got a bad feeling. Gilcat screeched and ran out of the room. Koushko just blinked and waddled after him. (I'm not saying he's fat but that's what he looks like when he moves.) The cat was gone in a second. "Just so you know Gilcat will tear up anything to stake his turf." "Don't worry Koushko will keep him in line!" I didn't like how he said that or how he grabbed my hand. Then all but dragged me to my room. "Wait in here I need to get something." For the first time since Russia took me to live with him. I was locked in my room. Instinct kicked in and I ran to the window. Only to find it frozen shut with ice on the inside?! (Calm down it's just a punishment. If he wanted to kill me he'd have done it already.) I took a moment to scan the room but besides being cleaned nothing had changed. (So what is he going to get and how messy will it be?) As usual Russia didn't keep me waiting long. I was facing the door when he came in. (Since hiding behind the door won't help me.) Russia had his hands behind his back and a creepy smile on his face. "Are you ready for me Maria or would you like to apologize first?" "Nein-" (What I can't move but he didn't do anything!) Russia laughed and walked up to me. "Wrong answer but don't worry it's just magic." My confusion made him chatty. "I want you to meet Viktor. He lives in my head and I believe. That he's similar to the being inside you." He moved away from me and did something to the bed. When he came back he had a blindfold in his hands.  
"It's time I tame you eagle!" (At least my monster doesn't like to be blind but I still can't move.) Once the blindfold was in place I felt him bind my wrists with cloth. Then I was moved to the bed and made to sit down. "Talk to me Maria are you afraid or does it affect your emotions?" I said nothing and he laughed. He made me lie down on my back. He got quiet and attached something to my legs. (It doesn't feel like chains but what is it?) I felt a blade cut through my shirt in one slice. (I may not be the easiest to seduce but I know what bondage is!) "This punishment would've been more effective. A couple of days ago Russia." "Maybe but I have my doubts about that." "Why are you going to rape me?" He cut my pants off and my underwear followed quickly. My boots and socks were pulled off my feet and I heard him get undressed. "This isn't about pain but it will hurt and once I'm done..." He climbed on top of me and made the restrictions stretch. Long enough for my legs to wrap around him. With the cloth keeping my legs in place. "How are you going to get inside me like this? Your cock is to soft for you-" He cut me off with a soft kiss and pulled away. "Don't worry just being on top of you is enough to get me hard." I could feel the truth in his words. But I didn't respond in kind. (Takes more than that to get me going. I'm surprised I didn't hear screams every night-) Russia grabbed my wrists and slid his head into my arms. So my limbs are around his shoulders and hips. I didn't know what to expect he ground his erection. Against my body until he was completely hard. My cock had stirred but that was natural due to his actions. What worried me was that I couldn't see. (He's not going to use any lube either!) Russia put his hands on my hips and shoved into me. I bit his neck to muffle my scream and he gasped. But that didn't stop him from moving. Unlike last time there was no attempt to be gentle. This was Russia fucking me into the mattress. With everything he had. (Damn how the hell is he so strong at this point I'm just biting him. To keep my screams muffled and to cause him pain.) "Fuck Maria you really know how to turn me on!" (Glad to hear it now die of blood loss.) Thanks to the blindfold I couldn't see his face. But I had no doubt that his eyes are glowing and my monster. Was enjoying every moment of this. (Which means I am to.) It's still rape since I didn't want to do this. This is a punishment meant to tame me and use my monster against West. (It won't be done in a round or be used just against West.) In a way Russia intends to fuck the entire world. He already has most of Europe and Asia. The only one who can stand up to him. Is a burger obsessed freak who has West and Japan with him! (How can I use this?) Russia didn't stop at one round that night. It might've been three or five but I think the bed was close to breaking. When he finally collapsed on top of me and I released his neck. "I can't believe you held on this whole time. Are you that ashamed of this?" "Are you done punishing me now?" He laughed and kissed my neck before replying.  
"That depends on you we'll stay like this. Until I fill your senses and you become mine." "What do you mean I signed the paperwork what else do you want?" "You know what I want and make yourself conferrable so we can sleep." "How can I sleep with you on top of me and get your cock out you bastard." "Nyet I told you we're staying like this until your mine." "Stop fooling around we're going to have to pee and you have work in the morning." "I'm not fooling around I've taken care of everything." "Bullshit." "Nyet it's part of the spell that Viktor cast on you earlier." "Why do you keep talking about someone. Who isn't here!" "Viktor is here allow me to explain." Since I had no choice I listened to his words all night. By the time he finished I wanted to kill Mongolia again. "That dagger is it cursed?" "Nyet it's just a regular blade. That Mongolia liked to use on children." "Have you used it-" "Nyet I only used it on you because your different from the other nations. Even Yao understands this though he doesn't know who you are." "You don't know who I am and you don't know what the thing inside me wants." "Da I do but go to sleep Maria I'll always be here when you wake up." I shook my head a little but I refused to play his game or beg. (This is a punishment to tame me. If he's serious about staying with me...) Once again Russia fell asleep before I did and I was stuck listening to his breathing. (Why is he doing this when he can just lock me up after raping me every night?) These questions plagued me constantly and Russia kept his word. He kissed my forehead and told me good morning but he left the blindfold on. So I had no idea how long we stayed like that. Or how many days passed as we went from raw fucking. To something that could pass for love making. If it wasn't for my monster. I might've believed that Russia meant his kind words. But just because it enjoyed the sex. Doesn't mean that we grew tame. (It just made us enjoy and more aware of Russia's body. If I concentrate hard enough. I can almost feel the Viktor he talks about.) "Take the blindfold off." (When did I ask that and why did he comply?) Being able to see didn't help me get free of Ivan's trap. But it did help me figure out when "Viktor" was watching me. (It's not just when his eyes glow. That's just when he's at his peak.) Viktor was always watching and Ivan rarely looked away from me. The few times he did was when he wanted to sleep. (So what do I make of this man and his declaration of love? How do I win my freedom? I can only think of one way...) "Tell me your name." It came out as a whisper but he heard me. "Tell me the name of the man. Who was dumb enough to do this to me." "What did I do?" "You made me curious and France will be jealous. Who knew you could be more perverted than him!" Instead of being angry Russia just cupped my face in his hands. "I'm only like this for you. No one else can make me feel like this." "What do I make you feel?" "Love, complete, and normal ask anyone. I admit to hurting and even raping other nations but that ends now." He kissed me and continued.  
"You are my future I need you with me. By my side forever I will give you everything you want!" "I only want your name..." (I can feel his tears there's no doubt. That he means what he says. But how did this happen?) "Ivan Braginski now it's your turn." "Gilbert Belschmidt but Ivan I can't stay. Once the wall is down I'll belong to West." (Please don't look like I just tore your heart out. Please get angry and hurt me. Because this is the truth and I can't change it!) Ivan's face was still wet with tears but he didn't look away. "Gilbert you'll die." "Ja." "He'll hurt you again." "Maybe." "Why?" "I love my brother more than myself." "What about me?" "I've already given you everything I can and I won't try to escape again. I'll stay with you until the wall comes down." "What about me!?" "I don't know what to say. I've only been in love once and I love West but..." I can't say anything else. Ivan's eyes are glowing with his pain and I felt the spell vanish. Then the restraints fell away and I couldn't keep my legs up. My hands are tangled in his hair and I bring him down for a kiss. It remained a soft one but I knew he understood. No matter what happens we only have an unknown period of time. It'll be a toss up of who senses the end first but I'll keep my word. Until the wall comes down I belong to Ivan. If I die during it's collapse or before West finds us. Then he can bury me with Fritz. (I won't tell him that last part though I'll wait and see how this ends.) "Ivan can I call you this when we're alone?" "Da I love you Gilbert!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They'll be at least two more chapters so look forward to them.


	22. Merged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now we see Viktor versus the monster!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if Prussia's favorite castle still exists but it's the perfect setting for this chapter.

I guess the plan did work but I can't fully enjoy it. Knowing that Gilbert will leave me one day. Makes me want to invade and kill Germany. But I don't need anyone to tell me that was a bad idea. Although Gilbert would still stay with me. Because the wall is still up. (As long as I can keep the wall up our happy days can continue.) Our days have been blessed with warmth. Now that Gilbert smiles at me. (Not sneers or baring his teeth but sweet shy little smiles. That are just for my eyes alone. It makes me so happy but I wished he said he loved me.) /He does love you I can see it in his eyes. He just doesn't want to hurt you. Because he still feels duty bound to leave./ That was the first time that Viktor spoke. Ever since I introduced him to Gilbert. He's just been a quiet buzz in the back of my mind. (How are you?) /Wonderful seeing you like this makes everything right./ (Not quite but there's nothing I can do is there?) /Nyet not about the wall but there is something you can do./ (What?) /You'll see./ Viktor stayed silent as our days went by. Then on a perfectly normal day it happened. My wall came crashing down and I had to cut a meeting short. Just to make it back in time. To see Germany run into my house. He was screaming his brother's name and I felt time stand still. Once he found him he tackled him to the floor and they laughed. "Your coming home with me." "Ja." I had never seen Gilbert cry so much before. But I could do nothing as Germany picked him up. I don't think Germany could see me as he walked away. With my happiness in his arms. But I shared a look with Gilbert over his shoulder. (Can it be are some of those tears for me?) I thought he tried to say something. But he quickly closed his mouth and stared at me. Until Germany kicked the door closed behind them and I felt Gilbert. Leave everything that I had tried to make for us. (Why didn't he say anything I know he wanted to...) Gilbert wasn't the first to leave me. The Soviet Union ended over a few years. It's been about 50 years or so since I last saw Gilbert. Yao says that he doesn't come to the meetings. Except to meet up with Germany at the end. To go hang out with their friends before heading home. I've tried to contact Gil through calls and letters. But he never replies. Even if Germany was interfering with the mail. Gilbert's phone number remained the same. (My spies have confirmed that.) So I decided to visit him at his house and talk to him. Even if Germany tries to stop me. I will find a way to see him. Getting to Germany has always been easy for me. But I never expected the man. To look so haggard as he let me into his house. At first the conversation was light and boring. It almost covered Gilbert's absence in the house. "Germany where's your brother?" "I was hoping he was with you." That broken sentence left me speechless as he told me what happened. After he took Gilbert from me. "He mostly sleeps and doesn't eat or drink. Except when I stand over him. But now I don't know where he is!" (He's actually crying in front of me but I can't hear him now.)  
/That's because we don't need to hear anymore. You know where he is./ (Of course how could I forget what day it is!) "Where is his king buried?" (Don't you dare ask which one I mean.) Fortunately he didn't and since knocking him out would've taken to long. I decided to let him lead me to wherever Gilbert is. It didn't take long for us to figure out. That Gilbert wasn't at Frit's grave. (But he was here long enough to leave flowers for his king.) "Where else would he be today?" (Maybe someplace he can make music?) "The castle with the French name it's a monument now but-" I took off and stretched out my senses. As far as I could and Germany followed. It was a miracle the castle survived and we reached the door. I knew he was inside somewhere but I wanted to see him alone. "Germany how badly do you want your brother to live?" "What kind of question is that?" "A simple one that must be answered now." I turned and faced him so he could see how serious I was. He only met my stare briefly before saying. "I just want him to be safe and happy." "He will be if my plan works." "Your going to take him away again." "Da but I'll permit you to see each other again." "When?" "As soon as I can trust him with a phone." I saw him wince and I tried to reassure him. "It won't be like with the wall-" "Nein but you still won't let him live with me." "Da but isn't it better that he live with me? Or do you want him to die with you?" The look he gave me reminded me of his Nazi days. But his words were cool and precise. "You said if your plan works what if it doesn't?" "Then he'll die in the castle that he loves and we'll bury him together." He stared at me again and asked. "Can I at least say goodbye?" "Da after I try my plan." "Why not now?" "Because you'll either try to stop me. Or give it away and I can't have that." (I've been away from him for to long and I won't let you spoil it.) Germany nodded and sighed. "I'll wait for you here." "Good boy make yourself comfy!" I went inside before he could say anything else. Gilbert's presence led me to the king's bedroom. (I should've known he'd come here where else is more perfect. For him to fade away and reunite. With his first love?) A stab of bitter disappointment almost made me turn back. This is what Gilbert wants after all who am I to deny him this end? (I love him and if his king were here he'd agree with me!) I've barely been around him when he was alive. But he did say he was a servant to his kingdom. So he would want Gilbert to keep living. (Even if Gilbert hates me I'll force him to live!) With these thoughts in mind. I entered the room and went to the bed. Despite wearing modern clothes and barely breathing. Gilbert looked perfect on the bed. (It's to big for one person and he's so cold!) /If your going to stop him you need to do it now. Before his heart stops beating./ (Are you sure this is the only way?) /Da if you want to ensure that he'll never die and always belong to you./ (Alright thank you for everything my friend I love you.) /I love you to I would do anything for you Ivan./ Viktor's words helped me form this plan.  
In the hopes that we will be happy. (But if this fails I'll lose both of them!) I lean over Gilbert and move the blanket and his shirt. Out of the way to expose his chest. I took out Mongolia's dagger and vowed to never use it again after this. (No one else will ever be infected with Mongolia's madness.) Gilbert wouldn't want the bed to be bloody but the fact that he hasn't stirred. Despite his military training only hardened my resolve. The blade felt good in my hand as I sliced through Gilbert's skin. I moved as fast as I could. To cut deep enough to get to his heart. Breaking his ribs shouldn't be as easy as it was but it saved time. The next step took about three seconds as I cut out his heart. Once I held it in my hand I reached into my chest and pulled out my heart. I put it into Gilbert's chest and started a healing spell. I knew from past experience that I can survive up to three minutes. Without suffering any fatal side effects so I should be able to heal him. Before I pass out from it not being in my chest. (Good thing I still have his heart. I can put it in my chest after I heal him.) My only means of tracking the time was by watching the spell progress. I only looked away when his chest. Looked like it was never cut. I wanted to check his pulse but my vision is starting to blur. /Ivan you need to take care of yourself now if Gilbert sees you like this.../ Did Viktor's voice get fainter just then I can't wait any longer. Gilbert's heart isn't beating but that's a moot point for a nation. My capital survived being burned. My heart will keep Gilbert alive. His heart will keep me alive and we'll be together. I put Gilbert's heart inside my chest and closed it. My vision kept spinning. I kept staring at his face for as long as I could. But I must've passed out. Because the next thing I knew Gilbert was screaming at me! "Damn you don't you dare die on me you basterad!" "Gil." I had to blink a few times. To make sure my eyes were working. While I did that I felt his hands gingerly touch my face. When I knew my vision was fine. I focused on his face and said. "Why are you crying?" "Because I'm pissed off at you. Why did you stop me I was with Fritz!" His words made me wince. But I refused to regret my desion. "I'm sorry Gilbert but I WANT YOU TO LIVE!" I had to shout to make sure he understood me. "I hate you so much Ivan what did you do to me?" "I gave you my heart and I'm using yours. So we'll always be one now." "What did you do to me?" He whispered it this time which confused me. (Is he afraid of me now?) I tried to move closer but he jerked away from me. "Don't!" "Why are you..." /Ivan I think we overlooked something./ (Your back Viktor but what-) My vision went red and I felt...angry? No that wasn't quite right and the more I looked at Gilbert. The worse it became until I wanted to punish him. (Why do I feel betrayed?) /You don't it's his heart and the thing inside him. Even now I don't know what it is./ (Does that mean your inside Gilbert?) /Da but Gilbert is panicking and the thing inside doesn't like me. It doesn't like that Gilbert was willing to die./  
"Gilbert can you hear Viktor now?" (I won't let this thing control me if it wants to hurt Gilbert. Then I'll find a way to kill it!) /Be careful it can hear you./ (Good.) I sat on the bed and reached for Gilbert slowly so as not to startle him. Or let the monster hurt him. Gilbert didn't move away but he did hide his face in his arms. "Gil-" "You have to undue this Ivan take it out of me." "I won't I finally have a way. To prove my love and you can't deny it anymore!" I gently take him into my arms and try to get him to look at me. "You can feel it can't you Viktor doesn't lie-" "Bitte Ivan I can't-" "Nyet I don't even know if I can reverse it. So we'll have to stay like this. When your feeling better we'll have to talk to Germany." "There's nothing to talk about." "Of course there is Kallingard. You have paperwork to sign." "I won't do it." "Da you will." (This is amazing I can feel his emotions so clearly. The monster has no chance against our love. It'll have to accept the situation.) Gilbert shook his head and quietly kept saying no. But he relaxed in my arms and didn't try to get away. "May I kiss you?" "Nein this bed doesn't belong to you." "But you do so I'll wait until I get you home again." "Your taking me to West's house." "Nyet but we will at least get some things for you. I've missed you so much." Gilbert said nothing but I felt him smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter to go please look forward to it!


	23. Monster tamed...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes angry sex is the way to go!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I own nothing except the plot.

I don't know how they expect me to adjust to another being in my head. Or Ivan's emotions all the time but I'm handling it by the day. (At least Viktor doesn't try to control me and feeling Ivan's emotions. Makes it easier for me to deal with him.) Of course that also works for him. Since it made things easier when we to talk to West and get my things. (It's been a week since then and the monster is still angry.) After I moved in and got settled into my old room. (It was always Ivan's room but he didn't want to scare me. While I was healing.) The monster made a habit of making itself known. Whenever Viktor tried to talk to me. It couldn't stop him or make it hard to understand him. Which always frustrates it and usually it'll try something with Ivan next. (But so far all it's been able to do is make his eyes glow.) /That's not true it keeps trying to get him to punish you./ (Really will it be satisfied if I punished myself?) /Nyet it'll only make things worse with Ivan./ I can't help but smile at that. Because Viktor was always honest and he'd try to stop me. Before I could do any harm to myself. But the monster will only get worse if it doesn't get what it wants. So if hurting myself is out of the question and Ivan won't punish me. Then I'll have to think of a way for us to resolve this. Fortunately the awesome me is known for my awesome strategies! /Should I feel worried for Ivan?/ (Nein and don't you tell him either!) Dinner was now held in the kitchen since we were the only ones living here. Usually whoever reached the kitchen first made the meal. While the other does dishes and we start talking about things. (It's amazing that we act like we've never been apart.) We sleep in the same bed and use the same things to complete our work. I became Kallingard and agreed to live with Ivan. (But we haven't had sex or made love since he brought me home.) That will change tonight and since I reached the kitchen first. I decided to make a meal he wouldn't forget. Being best friends with France and Spain. Have helped me learn some tricks. (Let's see what do you think Viktor what sounds good for dinner?) /How about chili he won't be expecting that kind of food./ (Good idea I wonder what his face looks like when it's all flushed.) If he knew Viktor didn't say. So I made dinner and Ivan came down. "Wow did you kidnap Spain or Mexico?" "Nein but don't let that bother you please enjoy yourself." "Thank you Gil it looks wonderful." Sadly I didn't get to see a flushed face but the way he smiled as he ate. Made me happy and I helped with the dishes after we were full. "Ivan are you still in pain?" "Nyet I'm used to having my heart move around. Why are you?" "Nein I'm just wondering if you changed your mind." "About what?" My hands are slightly damp from drying dishes. But Ivan doesn't complain when I reach up. To pull him down for a kiss. It was soft but when he pulled away I could feel the monster. Glaring at me through his eyes. "It's been a week if your not going to touch me-" "I want to make love to you all the time!" "Then why don't you touch me anymore? Even when we're in bed you barely hold me."  
The look on his face made it clear that the monster wanted him to move. But Ivan just kept staring at me helplessly and I sighed. "Perhaps it would be best if I moved out-" My back was suddenly against the wall and I looked up. Into a pair of murderous eyes. (But which of them is the angriest?) "That's a look I haven't seen in years what brought it on?" (I have to stay calm for this to work.) I've gotten taller since becoming Kallingard. But Ivan could still hurt me if he wanted to. "It's only been a week Gil why are you talking like this?" "Why do you think?" (I want to be yours but if your going to treat me like a doll. Because your afraid of hurting me. Then I'd rather be away from you.) Viktor must've told Ivan my thoughts because he stopped looking angry. "Gil I love you more than life itself." "Then make love to me!" I pulled him down for another kiss and this time it grew heated. My hands went to his scarf. So I could start undressing him but he stopped me. "Gil please it wants to-" "I know what it wants. Do you honestly think you know it better than me?" "Nyet but I-" Ivan I need and want you but if your going to let it get in the way. Then maybe I should go spend time with France or America!" (Maybe I shouldn't have said America.) /Run Gil I'll distract him!/ Was it just me or did Viktor sound excited? Either way I took him up on his offer. I'm not sure what he did but it made Ivan look disgusted. I ducked around him and ran out of the kitchen. "Gil get back here!" "Nein I won't live with a man who's afraid to touch me!" I ran for the door and I wasn't surprised. To feel him tackle me to the floor. "Your not going to leave me again." "Why not it's not like you need me to stay in this house." "Da I do." He rolled me over so I faced him. The look in his eyes made me very happy that I could feel his emotions. Because if I couldn't feel his love despite his rage I'd be terrified. "Why are you so determined to make me angry?" "Because it's the best way to resolve this. Now are you going to fuck me or not?" "On the floor?" "Why not it's our house." That made him laugh and I couldn't help but smile. "That's the first time you called it ours." "Ja well I want to call you mine and vice versa. So what's it going to be?" The monster was still mad but I felt Ivan's erection. (Which is stronger rage, lust, or will he lock me up instead?) /Neither he loves you./ I didn't have time to answer Viktor. It seemed Ivan was finally in the mood. He kissed me with passion. Then he picked me up and took me to our room. "I'm not taking you on the floor. When we have a bed that will feel better." "Always the romantic aren't you?" "Nyet but I want to do it this way. Especially if it tries to go to far." I wanted to ask how far but I was thrown onto the bed. Hard enough to knock the wind out of me. (Well it's about time he started getting the hint. Now what should I do next?) I decided on getting undressed while Ivan watched me. His eyes followed my every movement until I took my shirt off. (I guess it's been a while. Since he's seen so much bare skin.)   
The thought had me smiling into his kiss and I moaned. As his hands started caressing me. Somehow I managed to get his scarf off. But he jerked away from me just as I was reaching under his shirt. To touch his skin and before I could ask why. Ivan snatched my hands and pinned them next to my head. "Don't move." (Why does his voice sound like he's trying to growl?) That thought was soon forgotten as Ivan undid my zipper with his mouth. I watched him in awe as he pulled and tugged my pants down. Then he started sucking me through the boxers! (He's never done that before but damn it feels good!) I wanted to touch him so badly. But the second I moved my hands down to gently stroke his hair. He stopped moving and glared at me. "I told you to keep still do I need to restrain you?" "Nein but why can't I-" Ivan placed one of his hands over my mouth. "You wanted this but it's going to be my way understand?" I couldn't resist licking his palm and nibbling it when he didn't move. I knew Ivan could force my mouth shut. But I couldn't just lie there. Thankfully he knows me well enough to understand this. Ivan gave me a cold smile. Then he tore off my boxers and slapped my thigh. It didn't hurt so I spread my legs and grinned. Ivan chuckled and started to suck my cock. I couldn't help but moan and I started to lick his palm. This quickly turned into a contest to see who could produce the most moans. (Which I won despite having to bite his palm a few times.) He finally took his hand back. Just in time for me to cum with a shout. I wanted to kiss him but Ivan moved away and undressed completely. (No matter how many times I see him I'm still in awe...) Even with his eyes glowing with the monster's hate. Doesn't make me feel any different about this. "Ivan I need you to claim me." "Da I can see that." My cock was hard again and I smiled. "Are you going to stare at me all night or shall I do something?" My hand went to my cock and I got to give myself a stroke. Before Ivan ripped my hand away. Then held both of my hands in his. The look in his eyes was both dominating male, lover, and master. But he didn't make me wait any longer than necessary. (One of these days I'll have to buy lube. Being taken by Ivan will hurt to much if I don't.) The next few minutes were blown away. As the monster roared in my mind Ivan set a harsh pace. If he hadn't found my prostate right away. I would've been in agony. "Ah Ivan don't you dare stop!" (If he leaves me without cuming again. I'll beat him senseless!) The monster was pleased with us. Our combined lust and bloodlust made it pulse through my veins. That reminded me of my war days. Ivan grinned at me and went faster. Despite having cum that night it took a while for me to do it again. Once I did Ivan threw his head back and screamed my name. He came a few minutes after I did and I couldn't help but ask. "Your not going to tie me up again right there's no need-" Ivan kissed me and I felt Viktor laugh. "The next time I tie you up is when we both want it." "How about I tie you up?" "If you can catch me then I'll look forward to it."  
"I seem to have a pretty good grip on you now. But I don't feel like moving just yet." Ivan laughed and pulled out of me then he laid down beside me. I looked into his eyes and saw they were still glowing. "Is it satisfied or do I need to insult the motherland?" "Nyet don't do that. Besides you already know how it feels da." "Ja but I don't think you should try to suppress it by yourself." "I'm not and I don't want to talk about this right now ok?" "Ok let's just go to sleep then." He pulled me closer and I listened to his heartbeat. (Or is it still mine I never really thought about it before.) /Why don't you think of it. As belonging to both of you./ (All right I will and thank you.) /For what?/ (For not waging a war inside my head. I don't think I could've handled that.) /It's not trying to hurt or kill you Gil. It just wants to take care of you./ (Are you talking to it Viktor?) /Not like with you but it's similar to me. So that's how I know. That it's happy that you and Ivan are together./ (Are you happy?) /Da I've always wanted Ivan to have someone to love. Ever since I was born. I've wanted someone to hold him gently./ (Then we're all happy it's weird to think how long it took me. To realize I've been waiting for him. /Da and he's never letting go!/ "That's fine with me." "What?" "Nothing I was talking to Viktor I love you Ivan." "I love you to it's about time you said it!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading if you have any questions then leave a comment and I hope you read my other works when I post them.

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter we'll see the aftermath with Mongolia and little Russia!


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